clairemariarose 's review for:

They Can't Kill Us Until They Kill Us: Expanded Edition by Hanif Abdurraqib

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i don’t have words yet to accurately describe the impact this book has had on me. but never fear, my desire to yap will overpower my inability to do this book justice SOON

*returns 2 weeks later*

it was silly of me to think i could ever fully describe the value that lies within this masterpiece, but that doesn't mean i cannot try. hanif abdurraqib somehow makes use of language seem incredibly easy while also making it seem near impossible. how am i supposed to use the same words he uses when i know it will never be nearly as profound?

this essay collection covers subjects near and dear to my heart (namely fall out boy and my chemical romance), while also tackling universal experiences of grief and loss. it's analytical without being boring. it's personal without being self-aggrandizing. it's poignant without being pretentious. whatever pitfalls may awai an essay collection, hanif manages to expertly dodge. hanif can write an essay about the rapper future, someone to whom i have never dedicated more than two seconds of my thoughts before, and suddenly i am deeply invested in how heartbreak manifests itself in his music. because hanif is simply that good!!

i killed a highlighter in the process of annotating this book, fully drained it of life. there were simply too many lines to mark. no matter the subject matter, the brilliance and insight jump off the page. from a heartbreaking essay detailing the loss of his mother and missing the sound of her laugh, to a more lighthearted tone in writing about the experience of having a crush, i was able to take away something of value from every single piece.

i will read literally anything and everything this man writes ever again <3

also, i left this book as a carly rae jepsen fan, so do with that information what you will!