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A review by coolcatalycat
Grief Is for People by Sloane Crosley
5.0
4.8
This book mirrored a lot of my experience in grief, especially dealing with the loss of a bestfriend. initially, I didn’t go into it knowing that the author and I were grieving the same thing, but it couldn’t have found me at a better time.
I found it so interesting how she made a link between both the robbery and the death of her best friend. in both situations, she needed to grieve different parts of herself. she felt that if she could retrieve the jewelry that was stolen from her, she could have Russell back. mannnnn, the things we do when we’re in denial.
one event can alter our perception on our reality forever. often, in trauma, we reject the idea that we were ever impacted at all. It’s a coping mechanism. it seems small but oh boyyyyy, it is not.
we don’t have to feel “positively changed” by trauma. it’s okay to feel the negative impacts of what happened to you. again, I felt a lot of my experience was mirrored and it made me feel very understood, but it also helped me understand myself better.
It was just so well written and so beautiful and almost felt too intimate to read at times. I loveeee how towards the end, the writing was being directed towards Russell, like a letter. You can tell the author poured her heart into this book. It’s amazing what people can create through their pain. I am honoured to read stories like this, and to be able to find parts of myself in them.
I feel like this review is a little scattered oops. I’m exhausted writing this rn
Just some of the beautiful quotes found in this book (there are wayyy too many):
“I am in still in the early stages of grieving and I find it suspicious that you are not lurking around this planet somewhere. I have been making silent vows to find you: If you are in the trees, I will climb them. If you are in the bushes, I will trim them. If you are in the ocean, I will drain it.”
“The more you try to avoid suffering, the more you suffer, because smaller and more insignificant things begin to torture you, in proportion to your fear of being hurt. The one who does most to avoid suffering is, in the end, the one who suffers most.”
“To mourn the death of a friend is to feel as if you are walking around with a vase, knowing you have to set it down but nowhere is obvious. Others will assure you that there’s no right way to do this. Put it anywhere. But you know better. You know that if you put your grief in a place that’s too prominent or too hidden, you will take it back when no one’s looking.”
This book mirrored a lot of my experience in grief, especially dealing with the loss of a bestfriend. initially, I didn’t go into it knowing that the author and I were grieving the same thing, but it couldn’t have found me at a better time.
I found it so interesting how she made a link between both the robbery and the death of her best friend. in both situations, she needed to grieve different parts of herself. she felt that if she could retrieve the jewelry that was stolen from her, she could have Russell back. mannnnn, the things we do when we’re in denial.
one event can alter our perception on our reality forever. often, in trauma, we reject the idea that we were ever impacted at all. It’s a coping mechanism. it seems small but oh boyyyyy, it is not.
we don’t have to feel “positively changed” by trauma. it’s okay to feel the negative impacts of what happened to you. again, I felt a lot of my experience was mirrored and it made me feel very understood, but it also helped me understand myself better.
It was just so well written and so beautiful and almost felt too intimate to read at times. I loveeee how towards the end, the writing was being directed towards Russell, like a letter. You can tell the author poured her heart into this book. It’s amazing what people can create through their pain. I am honoured to read stories like this, and to be able to find parts of myself in them.
I feel like this review is a little scattered oops. I’m exhausted writing this rn
Just some of the beautiful quotes found in this book (there are wayyy too many):
“I am in still in the early stages of grieving and I find it suspicious that you are not lurking around this planet somewhere. I have been making silent vows to find you: If you are in the trees, I will climb them. If you are in the bushes, I will trim them. If you are in the ocean, I will drain it.”
“The more you try to avoid suffering, the more you suffer, because smaller and more insignificant things begin to torture you, in proportion to your fear of being hurt. The one who does most to avoid suffering is, in the end, the one who suffers most.”
“To mourn the death of a friend is to feel as if you are walking around with a vase, knowing you have to set it down but nowhere is obvious. Others will assure you that there’s no right way to do this. Put it anywhere. But you know better. You know that if you put your grief in a place that’s too prominent or too hidden, you will take it back when no one’s looking.”