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A review by soupdumpling
The Importance of Being Wilde at Heart by R. Zamora Linmark
3.0
3.5/5
For the bio that compare this to Elizabeth Acevedo's The Poet X -- How could one write such a lie...
This book definitely had me changing my opinion every couple of pages... One minute I was so excited at the prospect of LGBTQ Filipino stories (spoiler: as a non-binary Filipino-American, I was very let-down), the next I thought the "Wilde" concept was being pushed too hard, after I wondered if I had misunderstood the entirety of the plot, then got suckered as a hopeless romantic but annoyed at the entire dialogue and myself, and finally ending with general content but still feeling "eh". I wasn't looking for some life changing analysis of what it's like to be LGBTQ and Filipino, but if that is advertised as the crux of the plot, of course I am going to have some expectations going in... Sad to say most expectations were not met.
Things that were not bad
- I felt exposed lol. I was absolutely OVER Ken Z's character and found him whiny, impractical, asking too many questions, drawing too many hypotheticals, too many abstract thoughts with overthinking, prioritizing someone he just met over people he'd known for years, not valuing his single mother -- then I realized this was definitely a previous version of myself, especially around the time when I was in my first long-term relationship. I hated his character because it held some of the ugliest parts of my past that I had to learn to grow out of it. I can't help but wonder if others had this same type of self-reflection (although I feel like humans seldom like to admit when they were toxic and/or "bad" people...)
Things That We're BIG NOPES:
- There were so many moments where it felt like the author was trying "too hard" to craft Ken Z into this quirky bookworm nerd... the amount of similes and metaphors woven into his internal thoughts was far too much for my liking. After I looked into the author's background and saw his focus is primarily poetry, this made sense to me, but in the moment I was very thrown off by the FORCED "intellectual monologues" that occurred.
- The author literally... spells... everything... out... By throwing in so much "social justice language" it inevitably becomes jargon-y and in reality, no one talks like this. Yes my close circle and I believe in the liberation of all peoples and have very social justice-minded values... but do we address discuss issues as depicted in this text? NO??? Everything is spelled out as if it is an ethnic studies reading or essay.
- The usage of the "r-slur" out of NO WHERE as an insult ??? This was LITERALLY published in 2019 in the United States, there is ZERO excuse for this.
- CaZZ being trans was a diversity token. That's it. There was 0 development of her character nor did she receive any role other than being the "trans person who faced extreme trauma but is still surviving and now chooses to be outspoken". I also think it's ridiculous that the author is setting this in the Philippines and alludes to colonization but still abides by Westernized standards of genders and said "CaZZ should have been born with two XXs" ... gender is far more than sex ???
- Reading CaZZ's character PLUS with the incorporation of astrology and millenial humor just screams that the author is a privileged cis gay man trying to be relevant to younger LGBTQ audiences but fails terribly.
- The fact that Ken's friends forced him to come out (not with his sexuality, but with his mental health and processing) is so toxic??? It was wrong for Ken to not give any notice, but it was also just as wrong for the friends to literally CORNER him into sharing more about his depressive episode. No one is owned an explanation. He should not have to explain his mental health if he does not want to disclose it.
Quotes that got me through this book:
- Me: Actually it feels good to have another person in my small universe.
Oscar: Your world, Ken Z, is larger than you thought. It has always been. And now, with Ran, it's become even larger.
Me: Because of him?
Oscar: Because of love, dear heart. Because of love.
-"I remember; I wrote it down. I don't let words like that get away from me. They mean too much. Like that lingering hug he gave me before walking away."
- "What's happening to me? One minute, I'm writing a list to stretch happiness a little longer... The next, I'm writing a list to keep myself from drowning."
- "like ghosts, that we thought we had forgotten or already made peace with, memories that we never wanted and that continue to punish us by making us crave and wish we were doing more than just remembering."
For the bio that compare this to Elizabeth Acevedo's The Poet X -- How could one write such a lie...
This book definitely had me changing my opinion every couple of pages... One minute I was so excited at the prospect of LGBTQ Filipino stories (spoiler: as a non-binary Filipino-American, I was very let-down), the next I thought the "Wilde" concept was being pushed too hard, after I wondered if I had misunderstood the entirety of the plot, then got suckered as a hopeless romantic but annoyed at the entire dialogue and myself, and finally ending with general content but still feeling "eh". I wasn't looking for some life changing analysis of what it's like to be LGBTQ and Filipino, but if that is advertised as the crux of the plot, of course I am going to have some expectations going in... Sad to say most expectations were not met.
Things that were not bad
- I felt exposed lol. I was absolutely OVER Ken Z's character and found him whiny, impractical, asking too many questions, drawing too many hypotheticals, too many abstract thoughts with overthinking, prioritizing someone he just met over people he'd known for years, not valuing his single mother -- then I realized this was definitely a previous version of myself, especially around the time when I was in my first long-term relationship. I hated his character because it held some of the ugliest parts of my past that I had to learn to grow out of it. I can't help but wonder if others had this same type of self-reflection (although I feel like humans seldom like to admit when they were toxic and/or "bad" people...)
Things That We're BIG NOPES:
- There were so many moments where it felt like the author was trying "too hard" to craft Ken Z into this quirky bookworm nerd... the amount of similes and metaphors woven into his internal thoughts was far too much for my liking. After I looked into the author's background and saw his focus is primarily poetry, this made sense to me, but in the moment I was very thrown off by the FORCED "intellectual monologues" that occurred.
- The author literally... spells... everything... out... By throwing in so much "social justice language" it inevitably becomes jargon-y and in reality, no one talks like this. Yes my close circle and I believe in the liberation of all peoples and have very social justice-minded values... but do we address discuss issues as depicted in this text? NO??? Everything is spelled out as if it is an ethnic studies reading or essay.
- The usage of the "r-slur" out of NO WHERE as an insult ??? This was LITERALLY published in 2019 in the United States, there is ZERO excuse for this.
- CaZZ being trans was a diversity token. That's it. There was 0 development of her character nor did she receive any role other than being the "trans person who faced extreme trauma but is still surviving and now chooses to be outspoken". I also think it's ridiculous that the author is setting this in the Philippines and alludes to colonization but still abides by Westernized standards of genders and said "CaZZ should have been born with two XXs" ... gender is far more than sex ???
- Reading CaZZ's character PLUS with the incorporation of astrology and millenial humor just screams that the author is a privileged cis gay man trying to be relevant to younger LGBTQ audiences but fails terribly.
- The fact that Ken's friends forced him to come out (not with his sexuality, but with his mental health and processing) is so toxic??? It was wrong for Ken to not give any notice, but it was also just as wrong for the friends to literally CORNER him into sharing more about his depressive episode. No one is owned an explanation. He should not have to explain his mental health if he does not want to disclose it.
Quotes that got me through this book:
- Me: Actually it feels good to have another person in my small universe.
Oscar: Your world, Ken Z, is larger than you thought. It has always been. And now, with Ran, it's become even larger.
Me: Because of him?
Oscar: Because of love, dear heart. Because of love.
-"I remember; I wrote it down. I don't let words like that get away from me. They mean too much. Like that lingering hug he gave me before walking away."
- "What's happening to me? One minute, I'm writing a list to stretch happiness a little longer... The next, I'm writing a list to keep myself from drowning."
- "like ghosts, that we thought we had forgotten or already made peace with, memories that we never wanted and that continue to punish us by making us crave and wish we were doing more than just remembering."