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A review by dunder_mifflin
Entangled by Cat Clarke
5.0
This is a reread, I've read this book quite a few times now, every year or two I seem to come back to it and read it again. Every time I read it I understand it more.
BUT GRACE HAS BPD! Now I'm diagnosed, I recognised it right away, but after having gone for years with these symptoms and no diagnosis it explains why I related to Grace so much but couldn't really understand why other than 'she self harms too'.
I first read it when I was 13, maybe? And I'd started self harming by this point, which is why I picked the book up in the first place. The second time I read it would have been a few years later, and by the third time I'd had sex and definitely understood how she feels about Nat - obsessed, in love, or both? I understood that obsession and need to be loved.
Reading it now, she strikes me as having Borderline Personality Disorder. I'm gonna put the symptoms and how she fits each one/if she does (tho it contains spoilers). Bear in mind only 5 symptoms are needed to diagnose someone:
2. Unstable relationships. - Grace & Nat's relationship was up and down a lot, very messed up, and she fell in love with him after a few days? A week? I can't remember, but it was very BPD with the sudden obsession/love thing. Grace & Sal's friendship is very messy; they fight a lot and have many ups and downs. Grace & her mum have a very unstable relationship. I could not name one stable relationship in her life.
3. Unclear or unstable self-image. - She goes from thinking she's the shit (which she is imho I love her to bits) to hating herself and thinking she doesn't deserve Nat because she's so shitty etc etc. Talks about how smart she is acing all her exams then hates herself a few pages later. I could go on.
4. Impulsive, self-destructive behaviors. - She sleeps around a lot, and from the description of her first time it doesn't sound as though a condom was used. She drinks a lot, usually when upset or if something is worrying her.
5. Self-harm. - Grace cuts, we see this happen a lot, especially after an argument.
6. Extreme emotional swings. - Grace seems to get into a lot of arguments that come from nothing, often because of her reading into things too much, or feeling like she deserves to know something and not being given that knowledge. One moment she can be happy with Nat or Sal and the next they've had a fight and left and she's hurting herself. One day she's doing alright, fixing things with Nat and feeling positive about their future. 2 days later she tries to kill herself.
7. Chronic feelings of emptiness. - Not sure exactly with this one. Might be there, might not: it's not something I paid much attention to anyhow.
8. Explosive anger. - She slapped Sal after she said something hurtful (although tbh if someone had said what Sal said to me I'd have done the same, bUT then again I have BPD soooo..... this just backs up my point even more??) She gets angry a lot, at herself too, hence the self harming.
9. Feeling suspicious or out of touch with reality. - She does get suspicious a lot (although tbh with everything that was happening behind her back can she be blamed?) and she often catches herself doing it and is like "why am I thinking this??". Also when in a coma she constructs a different reality for herself where she's been kidnapped - not sure if that's a common thing with coma patients/just a way to tell the story but I figured I'd put it here anyway.
SO BASICALLY TL;DR/YOU DIDN'T WANT SPOILERS I love this book so much because I relate to Grace since we have the same personality disorder don't fight me on this Grace has BPD 100% confirmed.
BUT GRACE HAS BPD! Now I'm diagnosed, I recognised it right away, but after having gone for years with these symptoms and no diagnosis it explains why I related to Grace so much but couldn't really understand why other than 'she self harms too'.
I first read it when I was 13, maybe? And I'd started self harming by this point, which is why I picked the book up in the first place. The second time I read it would have been a few years later, and by the third time I'd had sex and definitely understood how she feels about Nat - obsessed, in love, or both? I understood that obsession and need to be loved.
Reading it now, she strikes me as having Borderline Personality Disorder. I'm gonna put the symptoms and how she fits each one/if she does (tho it contains spoilers). Bear in mind only 5 symptoms are needed to diagnose someone:
Spoiler
1. Fear of abandonment. - Grace ends up begging Nat not to leave her, telling him she doesn't know what she'd do without him, literally sitting by her phone waiting for him to text after they've had a fight, worried that he won't, or worried that he won't show up when they've arranged to meet. She constantly frets about losing him and it's just. Yeah.2. Unstable relationships. - Grace & Nat's relationship was up and down a lot, very messed up, and she fell in love with him after a few days? A week? I can't remember, but it was very BPD with the sudden obsession/love thing. Grace & Sal's friendship is very messy; they fight a lot and have many ups and downs. Grace & her mum have a very unstable relationship. I could not name one stable relationship in her life.
3. Unclear or unstable self-image. - She goes from thinking she's the shit (which she is imho I love her to bits) to hating herself and thinking she doesn't deserve Nat because she's so shitty etc etc. Talks about how smart she is acing all her exams then hates herself a few pages later. I could go on.
4. Impulsive, self-destructive behaviors. - She sleeps around a lot, and from the description of her first time it doesn't sound as though a condom was used. She drinks a lot, usually when upset or if something is worrying her.
5. Self-harm. - Grace cuts, we see this happen a lot, especially after an argument.
6. Extreme emotional swings. - Grace seems to get into a lot of arguments that come from nothing, often because of her reading into things too much, or feeling like she deserves to know something and not being given that knowledge. One moment she can be happy with Nat or Sal and the next they've had a fight and left and she's hurting herself. One day she's doing alright, fixing things with Nat and feeling positive about their future. 2 days later she tries to kill herself.
7. Chronic feelings of emptiness. - Not sure exactly with this one. Might be there, might not: it's not something I paid much attention to anyhow.
8. Explosive anger. - She slapped Sal after she said something hurtful (although tbh if someone had said what Sal said to me I'd have done the same, bUT then again I have BPD soooo..... this just backs up my point even more??) She gets angry a lot, at herself too, hence the self harming.
9. Feeling suspicious or out of touch with reality. - She does get suspicious a lot (although tbh with everything that was happening behind her back can she be blamed?) and she often catches herself doing it and is like "why am I thinking this??". Also when in a coma she constructs a different reality for herself where she's been kidnapped - not sure if that's a common thing with coma patients/just a way to tell the story but I figured I'd put it here anyway.
SO BASICALLY TL;DR/YOU DIDN'T WANT SPOILERS I love this book so much because I relate to Grace since we have the same personality disorder don't fight me on this Grace has BPD 100% confirmed.