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A review by wyrmdog
The Dinosaur Princess by Victor Milán
1.0
I came back for the abuse this book heaps upon its reader at every turn. I did so willingly and with hope that this book would be the one that lifted the chauvinist idiocy and gave us more dinosaurs, more fantasy, and more fun. Alas, I was to be disappointed.
First, let's just talk about the worst part of the book: Melodia, the titular Dinosaur Princess. If you have even a modicum of imagination you can see why the book is named this and it has naught to do with its most superficial reading. Yes, Melodia rides a dinosaur. But before we get there, what does Melodia do?
She cries. At the end of EVERY STUPID SCENE she cries. She is portrayed as having grown not at all from her time as a military officer and war hero in the last book where she fought dinosaurs from horseback and lived to tell the tale. That badassery was jettisoned almost immediately so that we can see how distraught she is at the fate of ANOTHER dinosaur princess (the more superficially titled sort, but ultimately, the better character), her little sister. Instead of advocating for herself she needs to be rescued again only this time by grandma where she continues to be a blubbering moron instead of the amazing and fun character she could be.
No, this book settles on its haunches and gives us more dinosaurs, but dinosaurs that defy the laws of physics, dinosaurs that exist almost solely as an afterthought. This book gives us more female POV page-count, but spends it almost entirely on their failures or on their sobbing fits. This book gives us a frantic chase to rescue a kidnapped child only to have the entire narrative thread disappear as if it never was. In the process it peels back the skin to show us a political situation that is entirely ignored, but which if used, would have done wonders for the story.
I get that Melodia is traumatized and damaged by her rape and the abduction of her sister and feeling in over her head, but there is no progress, only a deus ex machina that makes her even the least bit tolerable. It just comes too late to matter.
The book lacks the gonzo fun of the Rose Sea, the gravitas of the Lord of the Rings or A Song of Ice and Fire - as well as their horror - and it lacks in delivering dinosaurs except as the most superficial of background elements.
The action scenes are stilted and un-fun. The dinosaurs are presented clinically. The homo-eroticism reads like the heter0-eroticism that came earlier, which is to say, clumsily. Intriguing characters are mostly dead now leaving us only with the bland ones (Montse excepted, but there is so little of her). There is so much potential here and ALL of it feels wasted.
I can't finish it and I have less than 20% of the book to go. I know I will finish it eventually, probably soon, but I am taking a break to read Nancy Drew. I need a palate cleanser before I finish. I am 99% positive that nothing that remains in this book will change my opinion of it, but I'll come back if it does.
First, let's just talk about the worst part of the book: Melodia, the titular Dinosaur Princess. If you have even a modicum of imagination you can see why the book is named this and it has naught to do with its most superficial reading. Yes, Melodia rides a dinosaur. But before we get there, what does Melodia do?
She cries. At the end of EVERY STUPID SCENE she cries. She is portrayed as having grown not at all from her time as a military officer and war hero in the last book where she fought dinosaurs from horseback and lived to tell the tale. That badassery was jettisoned almost immediately so that we can see how distraught she is at the fate of ANOTHER dinosaur princess (the more superficially titled sort, but ultimately, the better character), her little sister. Instead of advocating for herself she needs to be rescued again only this time by grandma where she continues to be a blubbering moron instead of the amazing and fun character she could be.
No, this book settles on its haunches and gives us more dinosaurs, but dinosaurs that defy the laws of physics, dinosaurs that exist almost solely as an afterthought. This book gives us more female POV page-count, but spends it almost entirely on their failures or on their sobbing fits. This book gives us a frantic chase to rescue a kidnapped child only to have the entire narrative thread disappear as if it never was. In the process it peels back the skin to show us a political situation that is entirely ignored, but which if used, would have done wonders for the story.
I get that Melodia is traumatized and damaged by her rape and the abduction of her sister and feeling in over her head, but there is no progress, only a deus ex machina that makes her even the least bit tolerable. It just comes too late to matter.
The book lacks the gonzo fun of the Rose Sea, the gravitas of the Lord of the Rings or A Song of Ice and Fire - as well as their horror - and it lacks in delivering dinosaurs except as the most superficial of background elements.
The action scenes are stilted and un-fun. The dinosaurs are presented clinically. The homo-eroticism reads like the heter0-eroticism that came earlier, which is to say, clumsily. Intriguing characters are mostly dead now leaving us only with the bland ones (Montse excepted, but there is so little of her). There is so much potential here and ALL of it feels wasted.
I can't finish it and I have less than 20% of the book to go. I know I will finish it eventually, probably soon, but I am taking a break to read Nancy Drew. I need a palate cleanser before I finish. I am 99% positive that nothing that remains in this book will change my opinion of it, but I'll come back if it does.