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A review by nataliya_x
Dominion: An Anthology of Speculative Fiction from Africa and the African Diaspora by Zelda Knight, Oghenechovwe Donald Ekpeki
1.0
Review only for the Nebula Award-nominated novella “Ife-Iyoku, Tale of Imadeyunuagbon” by Oghenechovwe Donald Ekpeki; I haven’t read the rest of the anthology:
This novella just did not work for me. On the surface it had all the elements that I anticipated to like — a post-apocalyptic society coming to fight against intruders, and discovering that there are deep issues within it as well, especially misogyny (“Violation of another man’s woman is a grave wrong, but in times like this when our survival is hanging on a thread, violation can be tolerated if it results in the production of a child.”) And out of all that, a new unexpected power emerges.
But reading it became a painfully dull experience for me.
First things first — it needed an editor, especially for punctuation (and at least one verb tense agreement, but that one I’ll let slide). A few missing commas I understand, but then it gets into my personal pet peeve - the missing commas when addressing someone. “Remember your place [missing comma] woman.” It’s that old wisdom of the difference between “Let’s eat, Grandma!” and “Let’s eat Grandma!” And it happens over and over again, to my utmost irritation.
Another one of my stickler issues: what the hell is a “see-er”? Do you mean “seer”? It’s already a word.
Now with that out of the way, here’s my real annoyance - the stilted prose. It’s monotone, not to mention awkward. See examples below:
Everything about that monotone paragraph is just a little off, from the rhythm to the unnecessary details. And it adds up over pages and pages:
Something about this reminds me of a writing I’d see in a high-schooler’s story. You know those “What I did on my summer vacation” essays? It’s like that, recounting everything step by monotone step: “And then this happened. Then this happened. Then he said this and did this.” It’s like the author has envisioned a movie-like scene in his mind and is putting it all on paper, play by play. But I want *more* from a book; otherwise I’d just watch a movie.
Also, this story misuses the word “evolve”. It uses it like one would for a Pokémon, not for populations.
Oh, and did I mention that this story has sophistication and subtlety of a sledgehammer? The simplicity of events and motivations is stark; the speechifying villain actually talks about “new order” and might as well be twirling a moustache to finish the cartoonish resemblance.
1 star. Not for me.
———————
My Hugo and Nebula Awards Reading Project 2021: https://www.goodreads.com/review/show/3701332299
This novella just did not work for me. On the surface it had all the elements that I anticipated to like — a post-apocalyptic society coming to fight against intruders, and discovering that there are deep issues within it as well, especially misogyny (“Violation of another man’s woman is a grave wrong, but in times like this when our survival is hanging on a thread, violation can be tolerated if it results in the production of a child.”) And out of all that, a new unexpected power emerges.
But reading it became a painfully dull experience for me.
First things first — it needed an editor, especially for punctuation (and at least one verb tense agreement, but that one I’ll let slide). A few missing commas I understand, but then it gets into my personal pet peeve - the missing commas when addressing someone. “Remember your place [missing comma] woman.” It’s that old wisdom of the difference between “Let’s eat, Grandma!” and “Let’s eat Grandma!” And it happens over and over again, to my utmost irritation.
Another one of my stickler issues: what the hell is a “see-er”? Do you mean “seer”? It’s already a word.
Now with that out of the way, here’s my real annoyance - the stilted prose. It’s monotone, not to mention awkward. See examples below:
“They had received correspondence from the other teams as to the manner of attacks they had met and with that information, they had prepared themselves.”
“Two of the soldiers conversed with themselves. Their equipment told them there was something here, but their eyes and senses saw and perceived nothing. They felt their way furtively around. The feel of their hands told them there were things about, even though their eyes told them otherwise. The leader of this team told his demolitions man to set the C4 charges. His man looked him askance. After all, the mission was a snatch and grab.”
Everything about that monotone paragraph is just a little off, from the rhythm to the unnecessary details. And it adds up over pages and pages:
“And then, in a sudden instance of revelation, the building became visible, and seemed to materialize out of thin air.”
Something about this reminds me of a writing I’d see in a high-schooler’s story. You know those “What I did on my summer vacation” essays? It’s like that, recounting everything step by monotone step: “And then this happened. Then this happened. Then he said this and did this.” It’s like the author has envisioned a movie-like scene in his mind and is putting it all on paper, play by play. But I want *more* from a book; otherwise I’d just watch a movie.
Also, this story misuses the word “evolve”. It uses it like one would for a Pokémon, not for populations.
Oh, and did I mention that this story has sophistication and subtlety of a sledgehammer? The simplicity of events and motivations is stark; the speechifying villain actually talks about “new order” and might as well be twirling a moustache to finish the cartoonish resemblance.
1 star. Not for me.
———————
My Hugo and Nebula Awards Reading Project 2021: https://www.goodreads.com/review/show/3701332299