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A review by zu_reviews
Belle: A Retelling of "beauty and the Beast" by Cameron Dokey
1.0
I'm sorry to give such a low rating for a story that was technically well written (it had no huge and glaring grammatical errors or giant plot holes). It was just that it seemed to contain my every pet peeve. I was able to finish it, as I hoped the ending was building up to something, but it failed to deliver for me.
For starters, the protagonist, Annabelle, is very salty and whiny about her looks. And, by her own admission, it wasn't even that she was ugly. She was beautiful, just not AS beautiful as her sisters (according to her) which were apparently so beautiful as to literally take some mens breath away, and to make her literally invisible if standing between them (which, when shown made zero sense as to why this even happened or was a big deal). Everything else for our MC is fine though, her sisters love her and are kind, her parents love her, she's her father's favourite, even their pseudo grand-fathers favourite. Her problems are self-inflicted, and honestly she was often being selfish (withdrawing from her family and outings when her family was only ever kind to her). I kept reading in hope's that she would be redeemed at the end, that perhaps her being a whiny tart was purposeful and this was a redemption story, but no such luck.
As a character, she felt very one-note, because all she would talk about is how she wasn't AS beautiful as her sisters. Even her cool hobby of wood-working wasn't explored and felt more like a fun fact about her brought up from time to time. It was supposed to be this unique aspect to the story, the twist to the original, but it was barely there. Truthfully, her sisters seemed far more interesting to read. I felt like I was reading the wrong story: forget the whiny girl obsessed with her looks, I want to read the story about the girls so beautiful they literally make men collapse. Belle thinks she's gonna have a hard time finding someone to love her because she's beautiful but not Beautiful with a capital B? How about the two girls who are only ever seen for their beauty, and literally make men collapse just from looking at them. Imagine trying to go court a guy when your date keeps collapsing at the sight of you.
To further my pet peeves, the voice of the MC was not just repetitive - because all she thought about was her looks- but she was the kind of narrator that kept saying things like "Let me back up and explain myself" or Have I told you this?" Or "as I said before..." Which just gets on my nerves. It's as if the writer doesn't know how to bring about anything naturally in the story, so the MC literally just says it: "let me tell you what I look like", "let me tell you about that one day when". Again, there's nothing technically wrong with this style of story telling, but combined with her whiny voice and being overly repetitive, if it's not your favourite thing as a reader it will grate on your nerves. Dokey also uses a LOT of allegory for description, and it just starts to feel odd and not very specific. Items and places that are seen multiple times, like the heartwood tree, are always described in the same way. It gets stale.
For a beauty and the beast retelling, the Beast enters the story very late, and fails to make any kind of impact or connection on the page. He never wants to talk about himself, so we never learn anything. They share limited to no dialogue together that grows their relationship. There isn't really a budding romance, she just wakes up one day and is like "actually I'm in love with him" and as a reader you don't feel it at all. It comes out of nowhere, based on nothing. And Belle does not come to the satisfying conclusion and recognize her selfish faults over the obsession of her appearance. They're just in love, and she lives happily ever after with no real consequences. Her family have all "learned to enjoy a simple life" which is just bizarre, as they were all kind people ready to embrace a simple life to begin with. They weren't proud, greedy or mean. Why did they need to be taught a lesson? It's like someone putting Mother Theresa through Nun camp. What are you trying to accomplish?
I suppose the "theme" of the story was something about how to see someone with the heart, but that doesn't come through because Belle and Beast are the least open and least interesting characters in the story and their time together is so short and uneventful. I could not give you one reason they are in love, or one example of their emotional connection. The side love story one of her sisters had was more interesting and fulfilling than what was supposed to be the lynch pin of the plot. Again, I found myself at the end of the book asking "why am I reading this story, when her sisters stories sound so much better."
For starters, the protagonist, Annabelle, is very salty and whiny about her looks. And, by her own admission, it wasn't even that she was ugly. She was beautiful, just not AS beautiful as her sisters (according to her) which were apparently so beautiful as to literally take some mens breath away, and to make her literally invisible if standing between them (which, when shown made zero sense as to why this even happened or was a big deal). Everything else for our MC is fine though, her sisters love her and are kind, her parents love her, she's her father's favourite, even their pseudo grand-fathers favourite. Her problems are self-inflicted, and honestly she was often being selfish (withdrawing from her family and outings when her family was only ever kind to her). I kept reading in hope's that she would be redeemed at the end, that perhaps her being a whiny tart was purposeful and this was a redemption story, but no such luck.
As a character, she felt very one-note, because all she would talk about is how she wasn't AS beautiful as her sisters. Even her cool hobby of wood-working wasn't explored and felt more like a fun fact about her brought up from time to time. It was supposed to be this unique aspect to the story, the twist to the original, but it was barely there. Truthfully, her sisters seemed far more interesting to read. I felt like I was reading the wrong story: forget the whiny girl obsessed with her looks, I want to read the story about the girls so beautiful they literally make men collapse. Belle thinks she's gonna have a hard time finding someone to love her because she's beautiful but not Beautiful with a capital B? How about the two girls who are only ever seen for their beauty, and literally make men collapse just from looking at them. Imagine trying to go court a guy when your date keeps collapsing at the sight of you.
To further my pet peeves, the voice of the MC was not just repetitive - because all she thought about was her looks- but she was the kind of narrator that kept saying things like "Let me back up and explain myself" or Have I told you this?" Or "as I said before..." Which just gets on my nerves. It's as if the writer doesn't know how to bring about anything naturally in the story, so the MC literally just says it: "let me tell you what I look like", "let me tell you about that one day when". Again, there's nothing technically wrong with this style of story telling, but combined with her whiny voice and being overly repetitive, if it's not your favourite thing as a reader it will grate on your nerves. Dokey also uses a LOT of allegory for description, and it just starts to feel odd and not very specific. Items and places that are seen multiple times, like the heartwood tree, are always described in the same way. It gets stale.
For a beauty and the beast retelling, the Beast enters the story very late, and fails to make any kind of impact or connection on the page. He never wants to talk about himself, so we never learn anything. They share limited to no dialogue together that grows their relationship. There isn't really a budding romance, she just wakes up one day and is like "actually I'm in love with him" and as a reader you don't feel it at all. It comes out of nowhere, based on nothing. And Belle does not come to the satisfying conclusion and recognize her selfish faults over the obsession of her appearance. They're just in love, and she lives happily ever after with no real consequences. Her family have all "learned to enjoy a simple life" which is just bizarre, as they were all kind people ready to embrace a simple life to begin with. They weren't proud, greedy or mean. Why did they need to be taught a lesson? It's like someone putting Mother Theresa through Nun camp. What are you trying to accomplish?
I suppose the "theme" of the story was something about how to see someone with the heart, but that doesn't come through because Belle and Beast are the least open and least interesting characters in the story and their time together is so short and uneventful. I could not give you one reason they are in love, or one example of their emotional connection. The side love story one of her sisters had was more interesting and fulfilling than what was supposed to be the lynch pin of the plot. Again, I found myself at the end of the book asking "why am I reading this story, when her sisters stories sound so much better."