Reviews tagging 'Death of parent'

Smoke Gets in Your Eyes by Caitlin Doughty

61 reviews

angorarabbit's review against another edition

dark funny hopeful informative lighthearted reflective sad slow-paced

3.5

Context:  I have been following Ms Doughty’s YouTube channel for a few years now, it’s about time I read her first book. 

 

This is mainly a memoir and I am not qualified to judge Ms Doughty’s life. Her writing style is bright and breezy even when talking about serious things. That is not to say that she makes light of her topics, she absolutely does not. She sounds like the type of funeral director I wish my mother had talked to when choosing the casket for my grandfather. 

 

There has been many deaths in my life, human and non-human animals. And I have been watching the videos so the message of the book was something I was familiar with already. I can see that it would be very helpful for those who are having their first encounter with the US funeral industry. 

 

One of my fears about death is the mess someone or other will have to clean up. I would be happy if my cats could eat not just my eyeballs but the rest of me as well, leaving a nice clean skeleton to put in some anatomy lab somewhere. While it does not seem like putting bodies in the forest for the bear, wolf, and mountain lion to consume willt be feasible (at least not legally) in the near future, I hope  Ms Doughty and others will make a future in the US where loved ones are not pressured to go into debt while their grief is still fresh and where everyone can grieve as they need too.

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Child death, Drug abuse, Grief, Injury/Injury detail, Gore, Medical content, Suicidal thoughts, Terminal illness, Suicide, Dementia, Cannibalism, Death of parent, Blood, and Death

Moderate: Car accident

Graphic descriptions of the process of cremation, embalming, and other funeral practices.

nialystic's review against another edition

dark hopeful informative reflective medium-paced

3.75

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Death, Injury/Injury detail, Death of parent, Suicide, Gore, Child death, Body horror, and Drug abuse

Moderate: Fatphobia and Suicidal thoughts

finnickdeservedbetter's review against another edition

challenging dark emotional funny informative lighthearted reflective sad medium-paced

5.0

Themes

• Death and mortality
• Death positivity and death plans
• The American/western Death industry
• Confronting the fear of death
• Death practices

My Thoughts:
Baby's (23yo's) first memior!

I was already familiar with Caitlin prior to reading this. Both through her YouTube videos and having read her other two novels.

Favourite Quote:

“Through the thick fog, I coyld barely make out a sign above the road: cemetery, 1 mile. I strode up the hill, walking straight down the center of the road with big, bild steps—bigger and bolder than my cardiovascular health should have allowed for."

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Grief, Death, and Child death

Moderate: Suicidal thoughts and Suicide

Minor: Medical content, Blood, Miscarriage, and Death of parent

ehamlett's review against another edition

informative reflective medium-paced

4.0

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Death of parent, Child death, Medical content, and Death

Moderate: Grief

Minor: Blood, Animal death, and Dementia

frankieclc's review against another edition

5.0

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Death, Terminal illness, Death of parent, Suicidal thoughts, Blood, Child death, Grief, Medical content, Injury/Injury detail, Cannibalism, Suicide, Body horror, and Gore

savyelizabeth's review against another edition

challenging dark emotional funny hopeful informative lighthearted reflective sad medium-paced

3.5

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Child death, Death of parent, and Death

Moderate: Suicide, Suicide attempt, and Drug abuse

Minor: Classism and Racism

wai's review against another edition

adventurous dark informative inspiring reflective sad fast-paced

5.0

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Child death, Death of parent, Gore, Blood, Medical content, and Death

just_jeffrey0597's review against another edition

informative reflective medium-paced

5.0

Very informative and leads to a thought provoking experience about death and dying in American society 

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Content Warnings

Moderate: Cancer, Cannibalism, Death, Grief, Death of parent, Child death, Dementia, Addiction, Drug use, and Drug abuse

cadence99's review against another edition

dark emotional informative reflective sad medium-paced

2.5

What I liked:
•the discussion of death practices in various cultures 
•the authors personal musings on how best to manage the image and processing of death

What I didn’t like:
•chapters feel a bit disjointed in their themes
•the repeated use of race as a descriptor for ONLY non-white people when it is irrelevant to the narrative of the story being told
•pretty gross anti-fat comments, primarily in one particular section where she talks about her coworker declaring that despite the medical examiners determination to the contrary, the person MUST have died of a heart attack from being so fat and “This is why you can’t be fat!”- in addition to describing in great detail how fat bodies smell worse, but then dismissing the coworkers comments as “just fact” (even though he is literally ignoring fact by assuming the mans cause of death is not the one determined by the examiners professional assessment)
• in the same scene as above, repeatedly bringing up how her coworkers continually mistakenly say the person is Mexican, despite him being Salvadoran 
•irrelevant added story where a coworker says they should fire bomb the city of San Francisco because it is a “hell pit”

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Drug use, Medical content, Medical trauma, Miscarriage, Suicide attempt, Cancer, Car accident, Fatphobia, Mental illness, Self harm, Suicidal thoughts, Violence, Body horror, Cannibalism, Chronic illness, Fire/Fire injury, Gun violence, Infertility, Death, Death of parent, Drug abuse, Ableism, Gore, Grief, Injury/Injury detail, Pregnancy, Suicide, Terminal illness, Abortion, Blood, Dementia, Racism, Addiction, and Child death

rhi_reading's review against another edition

challenging emotional informative medium-paced

3.5

A frank and honest look at the death industry in the US, this book is a Frankenstein’s monster of memoir, manifesto, and general musings on death and mortality that doesn’t shy away from the gory details. If you’ve currently got a newborn baby, I’d recommend skipping the chapter on infant cremation. 

I awarded the book 3.5 because while the subject matter was interesting, the prose was a little over-written and quippy for my taste. The author’s breeziness around morbid topics is a key feature of the book that does benefit the text overall, but there are times when she would have benefited from drawing back a little and letting the actual topic at hand speak for itself instead of trying to cram in a pithy observation or half-hearted joke. 

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Gore, Dementia, Medical trauma, Blood, Suicide attempt, Suicidal thoughts, Death of parent, Medical content, Injury/Injury detail, Grief, Child death, Death, Suicide, and Miscarriage