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3.52 AVERAGE
3.52 AVERAGE
A very enlightening and insightful read, felt that the structure of the verses was unnecessary but other than that it was good.
emotional
reflective
medium-paced
an incredibly accurate take on anxiety.
I started having panic attacks my junior year of high school. I honestly had no idea what was happening until i went to the doctor and found out that I didn't know how to cope with stress anymore. I related (on more than one level) with this author and her story. Anxiety and depression in general make you feel as though you'll be this way forever, that nothing will ever change and you will forever be stuck in this shitty cycle of SHIT. I liked this book a lot and wish I would've read it years ago.
I started having panic attacks my junior year of high school. I honestly had no idea what was happening until i went to the doctor and found out that I didn't know how to cope with stress anymore. I related (on more than one level) with this author and her story. Anxiety and depression in general make you feel as though you'll be this way forever, that nothing will ever change and you will forever be stuck in this shitty cycle of SHIT. I liked this book a lot and wish I would've read it years ago.
I breezed through this book in one night. It's a memoir-in-verse of a girl living with an anxiety disorder during her college years at Skidmore. She goes beyond just discussing what it's like to live with the symptoms. One of the most striking revelations is learning to accept that new reality--that her "old self" from high school is not really who she is now. That includes accepting that it will probably be a cycle of recovery and relapse forever. It was heartbreaking to watch her end her trip across Europe early because her anxiety was too much to handle. There's a fine line between taking care of yourself and enabling yourself to hide behind your disorder--constantly giving yourself outs so that you don't have to participate. With an anxiety disorder, it's hard to really gauge what your limits really are, or if it's just the disorder talking. I think the most important take away is, no matter how bad you feel, you will feel better. And when you do feel better, it's not worth getting worried about when you will feel bad again.
emotional
reflective
medium-paced
Plot or Character Driven:
Character
Strong character development:
Yes
Loveable characters:
Yes
Diverse cast of characters:
No
Flaws of characters a main focus:
Yes
Content Warnings
Graphic: Mental illness, Panic attacks/disorders
Minor: Sexual content, Sexual harassment
What I liked most about this book is that it told Samantha’s true story. There were aspects that all individuals, even those who have not been diagnosed with anxiety disorder, could relate to. She speaks about the trails and errors of medications, getting your first job after college, and how important it is to find a friend who is your constant. Well done.
“I am scared that the only reason I am getting better is because of these little yellow pills, that nothing has really changed except biology, that the pills are a mask, that I am fooling myself into feeling better, that each day I get more addicted, that I will be medicated for the rest of my life.”
“Is this what all the years of schooling were for? To prepare me for this sense of being stuck in the middle? What was the point? No one said I was going to be this sad. No one said I would still be crying.”
“I am only twenty-one. I have been out of college only a few months. I don’t want to have a job that I think is merely all right. But then I see street sweepers, men polishing marble floors, people selling magazines and nuts on the street, and I think I am a spoiled brat.”
“I am scared that the only reason I am getting better is because of these little yellow pills, that nothing has really changed except biology, that the pills are a mask, that I am fooling myself into feeling better, that each day I get more addicted, that I will be medicated for the rest of my life.”
“Is this what all the years of schooling were for? To prepare me for this sense of being stuck in the middle? What was the point? No one said I was going to be this sad. No one said I would still be crying.”
“I am only twenty-one. I have been out of college only a few months. I don’t want to have a job that I think is merely all right. But then I see street sweepers, men polishing marble floors, people selling magazines and nuts on the street, and I think I am a spoiled brat.”
What's fascinating in reading a book about a young person's first-hand experience with anxiety from 15 years ago -- to be rereleased this year -- is how much has changed in terms of access to information and community and how little has changed around stigma and understanding. There were lines in here that were downright haunting and made me flash back to my own experiences prior to diagnosis, medication, and management. The author's note in the new edition covers these things well and highlights how vital it is for talking about our experiences, as raw, as vulnerable, and as hard as they might be.
The references are funny to read now, given that CDs aren't a thing anymore and that The Internet is no longer a thing you only go to when you need to research something in depth, but it's a memoir. That's how it was. It's not quirky nostalgia.
Hand to readers eager for a Jewish writer and voice, as well as those seeking connection and understanding about mental illnesses like anxiety and panic disorders. It's set in college and written in verse as well.
The references are funny to read now, given that CDs aren't a thing anymore and that The Internet is no longer a thing you only go to when you need to research something in depth, but it's a memoir. That's how it was. It's not quirky nostalgia.
Hand to readers eager for a Jewish writer and voice, as well as those seeking connection and understanding about mental illnesses like anxiety and panic disorders. It's set in college and written in verse as well.
I can relate to the author's struggle with anxiety , for I suffer from it also. This was a quick read that shows how a person copes with constant panic attacks.
"But the more I think about it, the more scary life without panic seems. My life has been governed by anxiety for the last five years. It fills up my time. The practice of doing nothing- of staring at walls and letting my mind go- is torture. I don't know how to live like that. I only know how to live like this- with this feeling in my stomach."
Schutz does such an amazing job of describing an adolescent and college life filled with mental illness- of feeling like a prisoner to your own mind, and feeling like your life is slipping away without you. This is an amazing read for anyone with an anxiety or mood disorder to feel resonated with, and anyone without mental health issues to understand what your loved ones go through daily.
Schutz does such an amazing job of describing an adolescent and college life filled with mental illness- of feeling like a prisoner to your own mind, and feeling like your life is slipping away without you. This is an amazing read for anyone with an anxiety or mood disorder to feel resonated with, and anyone without mental health issues to understand what your loved ones go through daily.
While parts of her struggle with anxiety were difficult to read I felt the narrative was handled well. Especially her struggle with treatment and being well. Mental illness is a continual struggle of ups and downs and I felt she did a wonderful job exemplifying that