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auteaandtales's review against another edition
dark
emotional
funny
hopeful
informative
fast-paced
4.0
chantelspeaks's review
5.0
For more reviews, head to my blog Chantel Speaks
“Why is it more important to defend yourself from accusations of ableism than to listen to my story of experiencing it?”
Say Hello is an important book if you’re going to read about the lives of disabled people, and I don’t say this lightly. As a community we lack first-hand accounts of disability that are a call to action, to learn more and to help us question our own activism, disabled or abled.
Carly Findlay pours her life into these pages, the good and the not-so-good, learning to see herself as disabled and all that comes with the term, and to use the label with pride. This was a somewhat slow burn read for me that I read over the course of a year, which I really enjoyed. There was so much to think about within each chapter that I liked reading a chapter, then going away and thinking about it till I was ready for the next one.
I have been following Carly’s work for sometime and was excited to know a memoir of this kind was out in the world. I was so eager that I even attended her book launch in Adelaide while recovering from a broken leg, the first time I’d left the house alone in months. As a disabled person myself, it's important for me to not only learn about the experiences of other disabled people, but to learn from them as well.
“It’s hard to feel proud when someone is grieving for a life that could have been, when you’re still here.”
The topics that Carly deals with in Say Hello are vital for anyone to read. The labour that goes on behind the scenes of any kind of disability, the regular ableism and oppression that disabled people experience, and the persistent questioning of the disabled experience. I had read reviews where some reviewers felt that Carly repeated herself a lot about the ableism she experienced - and I think that’s just the point. Disabled people experience ableism over and over again. I’ve lost count of the amount of times someone deferred to my able bodied friend, rather than speak to me - it’s not like this stuff just happens one time and never again. We deal with the same issues on a continuous basis.
“There are so many ways to do activism - whatever works for you. But don’t put down others who do it differently.”
This memoir gave me a lot to think about in terms of how I approach activism. I don’t really call myself an activist, but I do activist things at times. When you are marginalised, many of your actions to better yourself and those around you become a type of ‘activism’, and because we come to disability from a myriad of different life experiences, we have to be open to others working differently and seeing the world from a different viewpoint.
Carly’s points on awareness, were for me, those that stayed with me after I was done reading. I have always felt uncomfortable with Awareness Months for my own disability, not because I don’t want the awareness, but because of how much I would need to expose myself emotionally in order to be able to do it. I just don’t want my life on display so publicly in that way.
“Awareness for awareness’ sake is of little benefit to the community it purports to serve.”
I have been more conscious of how I do awareness since reading Say Hello. The discomfort I’ve felt around exposing so much of my personal story for the sake of awareness was an area that this memoir gave me some breathing space. I understand now that doing that is a choice. In order to raise awareness, its not just on the person who experiences it, but on those around them to also take some lead also.
I really enjoyed Carly’s words and her story. It’s an important viewpoint and even if you don’t agree with everything or this isn’t quite your experience, I would encourage you to acknowledge that experiences of disability are as diverse as the community itself. This is a memoir that I would encourage people of all walks of life to read, not simply those who are in the disabled community.
“Why is it more important to defend yourself from accusations of ableism than to listen to my story of experiencing it?”
Say Hello is an important book if you’re going to read about the lives of disabled people, and I don’t say this lightly. As a community we lack first-hand accounts of disability that are a call to action, to learn more and to help us question our own activism, disabled or abled.
Carly Findlay pours her life into these pages, the good and the not-so-good, learning to see herself as disabled and all that comes with the term, and to use the label with pride. This was a somewhat slow burn read for me that I read over the course of a year, which I really enjoyed. There was so much to think about within each chapter that I liked reading a chapter, then going away and thinking about it till I was ready for the next one.
I have been following Carly’s work for sometime and was excited to know a memoir of this kind was out in the world. I was so eager that I even attended her book launch in Adelaide while recovering from a broken leg, the first time I’d left the house alone in months. As a disabled person myself, it's important for me to not only learn about the experiences of other disabled people, but to learn from them as well.
“It’s hard to feel proud when someone is grieving for a life that could have been, when you’re still here.”
The topics that Carly deals with in Say Hello are vital for anyone to read. The labour that goes on behind the scenes of any kind of disability, the regular ableism and oppression that disabled people experience, and the persistent questioning of the disabled experience. I had read reviews where some reviewers felt that Carly repeated herself a lot about the ableism she experienced - and I think that’s just the point. Disabled people experience ableism over and over again. I’ve lost count of the amount of times someone deferred to my able bodied friend, rather than speak to me - it’s not like this stuff just happens one time and never again. We deal with the same issues on a continuous basis.
“There are so many ways to do activism - whatever works for you. But don’t put down others who do it differently.”
This memoir gave me a lot to think about in terms of how I approach activism. I don’t really call myself an activist, but I do activist things at times. When you are marginalised, many of your actions to better yourself and those around you become a type of ‘activism’, and because we come to disability from a myriad of different life experiences, we have to be open to others working differently and seeing the world from a different viewpoint.
Carly’s points on awareness, were for me, those that stayed with me after I was done reading. I have always felt uncomfortable with Awareness Months for my own disability, not because I don’t want the awareness, but because of how much I would need to expose myself emotionally in order to be able to do it. I just don’t want my life on display so publicly in that way.
“Awareness for awareness’ sake is of little benefit to the community it purports to serve.”
I have been more conscious of how I do awareness since reading Say Hello. The discomfort I’ve felt around exposing so much of my personal story for the sake of awareness was an area that this memoir gave me some breathing space. I understand now that doing that is a choice. In order to raise awareness, its not just on the person who experiences it, but on those around them to also take some lead also.
I really enjoyed Carly’s words and her story. It’s an important viewpoint and even if you don’t agree with everything or this isn’t quite your experience, I would encourage you to acknowledge that experiences of disability are as diverse as the community itself. This is a memoir that I would encourage people of all walks of life to read, not simply those who are in the disabled community.
philippakmoore's review
5.0
This is a powerful, honest and important book about disability and difference, and being your own champion. Carly is a compassionate and intelligent writer who also (quite rightly) doesn’t pull any punches. Say Hello, she explains, is the book that she needed when she was younger, that she hopes disabled readers will find useful and supportive. But Say Hello is also an invitation to non-disabled readers to really listen to the experiences of others, to reflect on and acknowledge our privilege, and to educate ourselves on how to do better and be better allies rather than expect the disabled community to do it for us. Prejudice and ableism are rife in our society and Carly shines a bright, much-needed light on them.
Enjoyable, engaging and educational - this book deserves a very wide audience indeed.
Enjoyable, engaging and educational - this book deserves a very wide audience indeed.
hoadjie's review
4.0
I didn't read this book, i listen to it on audible read by Carly. But i still wanted to leave a review.
it is a very interesting book and a bit of an eye opener. i have never realise how much disable people have to go through on a day to day basses, as well i didn't relies some of things i though would be nice or helpful towards someone might in fact upset them or make them fill uncomfortable.
it has given me a lot to think about.
thank you for sharing your story with us. good luck Carly with your future endeavours.
it is a very interesting book and a bit of an eye opener. i have never realise how much disable people have to go through on a day to day basses, as well i didn't relies some of things i though would be nice or helpful towards someone might in fact upset them or make them fill uncomfortable.
it has given me a lot to think about.
thank you for sharing your story with us. good luck Carly with your future endeavours.
essjay1's review
4.0
Fans of Carly Findlay will love this book and for those of us who hadn’t seen a lot of her work it was a great informative read. Part memoir, part guide to being a better community citizen and help stand up for the rights of people who may be finding existing in this world a bit tougher than you are.
kcfromaustcrime's review
5.0
I saw a Clementine Ford quote along the lines of "it's okay to be angry... All these years, people have been calling you 'angry' as if it's a shameful thing, when what they really mean is 'your refusal to be contained frightens me'. It is okay for you to be angry."
Carly Findlay's taken her absolute right to be very angry about a heap of stupid things, and turned it into an opportunity to point out some truths. The micro-aggressions, the blatant ableism, the intrusion, the mindless behaviour, the staring, the sniggering, the frankly slappable offences that she's faced for much of her life have made her very angry indeed, and it's a good thing that she's been as forthright with her reactions as the much missed Stella Young was on a similar range of experiences.
I learnt so much from reading Carly Findlay's excellent book. I was thrilled to see her anger, interested to see her understanding and ability to empathise with others (something we should all take note of). Couldn't help but cheer at some of the righteously pissed off responses to the flat out stupid and self-involved. Amazed to see her levels of acceptance and a willingness to reach out to those who are actively seeking engagement.
I am grateful that throughout this book there are lessons to be learnt, there are things that we all need to think about, and there are now bookmarks galore in my copy. Very pleased to see comments around that it's selling well. All power to the arms of angry young women everywhere, we need to be reading books like SAY HELLO.
Carly Findlay's taken her absolute right to be very angry about a heap of stupid things, and turned it into an opportunity to point out some truths. The micro-aggressions, the blatant ableism, the intrusion, the mindless behaviour, the staring, the sniggering, the frankly slappable offences that she's faced for much of her life have made her very angry indeed, and it's a good thing that she's been as forthright with her reactions as the much missed Stella Young was on a similar range of experiences.
I learnt so much from reading Carly Findlay's excellent book. I was thrilled to see her anger, interested to see her understanding and ability to empathise with others (something we should all take note of). Couldn't help but cheer at some of the righteously pissed off responses to the flat out stupid and self-involved. Amazed to see her levels of acceptance and a willingness to reach out to those who are actively seeking engagement.
I am grateful that throughout this book there are lessons to be learnt, there are things that we all need to think about, and there are now bookmarks galore in my copy. Very pleased to see comments around that it's selling well. All power to the arms of angry young women everywhere, we need to be reading books like SAY HELLO.
lozzyd's review
4.0
I've followed Carly on social media for some time and have been meaning to read this book for quite a while. Carly writes with such openness and honesty and shows such strength of character. This was such a great read and I loved every minute of it.
tillyally's review
3.0
Carly’s memoir has helped remind me to do better and to be a good ally for the disabled community. Carly helped me gain a better understanding of ableism / ableist language. There were parts of her memoir I found gripping but also found it quite repetitive at times.