Reviews with content warning for Homophobia - We Both Laughed in Pleasure: The Selected Diaries of Lou Sullivan

The world was lucky to have Lou Sullivan in it, and we are lucky now to have this excellent collection of his diaries. An absolute revolutionary for transgender and gender non-conforming people everywhere, and in particular for gay trans men, Lou's personal writings give us an invaluable glimpse of his pioneering life and work, as well as refreshingly explicit details of his erotic feelings and adventures.

Thank goodness for our queer and trans elders, who show us that we've always been here, always will be, and can/deserve to live full and happy lives.

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anothersun's review

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fast-paced

3.5

I didn't like this as much as others seem to have. Sullivan's internalized transphobia, or gender-devalidation at younger ages was really hard for me to handle. Not only how he spoke about himself, but also about other trans people - up until adulthood, where he still frequently chose to randomly misgender people after his own liking, "to better identify with them". I don't think it's nicely written - without a lot of personal connection to and interest in the themes, I wouldn't necessarily have read this. Ofc it's a diary, but hell, there are nicely written diaries. All in all, there were many elements I disliked about this, but I'm glad to have read it.

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imrereads's review

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emotional informative reflective sad slow-paced

5.0

I don't even know where to begin talking about this. For the days I've been reading this book, I feel I've been thinking about Lou Sullivan for all the hours I put the book down. I don't know if I can give this a review, but I have so many thoughts that I need to spend some time compiling. Here some fragmented thoughts:

It made me think about how much has changed in terms of trans rights and how we're virwed in society – and how much hasn't changed. It was so interesting to see how the terminology changed throughout his diaries, not only his personal way of identifying, but also the standard terms.

For a while I was thinking I wish I could have read this when I was younger, to have had this role model earlier, but I've concluded with being glad I read it as an adult. Lou Sullivan was by no means a perfect man, there are many instances of misogyny to give an example, and I'm glad I read it at a point were it's easy to be reflective and not romanticising.

I love the way he describes the beauty of men. I thought a lot about how he in his younger years especially spoke about wanting to be the men he loved.

This is a beautiful example of a supportive family, standing by him and loving him for who he was. It saddens me that he didn't have uncondintional support in his romantic relationships, rather dealing with men who didn't see him as a man or wanted to restrict the ways he transitioned. I just wanted to yell back through time "you deserve so much better!"

In the end, I cried.

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chuckyinspace's review against another edition

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challenging dark emotional funny hopeful informative inspiring lighthearted reflective sad medium-paced

5.0

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beanaroni's review against another edition

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emotional reflective medium-paced

5.0

As a queer trans guy, I see so much of my own journey in Lou's. He wasn't perfect, as none of us are, but he was honest and he was human. He cared so much for others and worked so hard to ensure that people like me could exist, unashamed, in the world. I feel such gratitude for the love that he showed himself in his lifetime, and such grief that the world lost him too soon. Thank you, Lou.

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phvntom's review

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emotional slow-paced

4.75

I really enjoyed reading Lou's story and he won't soon be forgotten. One small issue for me was the editors of the book chose to not date individual entries (though there are time frames for different sections of the book), and the pacing can become a bit awkward because of this.

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bashsbooks's review against another edition

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challenging emotional informative inspiring reflective sad medium-paced

5.0

Lou Sullivan's diaries made me laugh, cry, scream, scratch my head, text my friends in the middle of the night... I think everyone should read them. He has a really casually poetic style to his writings, and peering directly into his diaries is so intimate. His quote, "They told me at the gender clinic that I could not live as a gay man, but it looks like I will die as one," is going to stay with me for a long time (I've been reciting it to everyone). What an amazing man. How devastating it is that we lost him so young. How lucky we were to have him when we did.

I will say, I didn't love all the stylistic choices the editors made - I wish there had been clearer markers of the passing time, and the footnotes were a little sparse.

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lawnmower_man's review

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funny hopeful informative inspiring sad medium-paced

3.75

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