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3.18 AVERAGE
3.18 AVERAGE
Finished this today. I almost put it down, but when I picked it up again I breezed through. It was interesting and quick.
The first novel I've ever read that I would describe as "emotionless." That goes for the author as well as the narrator. I didn't hate Nate-- I hated the lack of plot, the tedious description, and Adelle Waldman's apparent disdain for people in general.
Strikes incredibly close to home. I've been a Nate, and I've been a Hannah. Waldman's social commentary is so astute and insightful, and I loved how she hit the whole range, between lovable jabs at Brooklyn and its gentrification, to the heavy blows at the insecurities of men and women in relationships and in life.
My immediate thoughts after reading this book & living inside the head of this irritating, despicable & slightly all too true literary Brooklyn hipster: Kill me now or just let me find a great job on a mountaintop somewhere remote!
I pictured the main character as the male protagonist from the 40 Days of Dating website, which perhaps illustrates how timely this story really is. It's a quick, thoughtful read that's both cathartic and anxiety-producing for a twenty-something woman like me. This book interested me not only because it was a brief behavioral study of people in my exact demographic, but because I don't date, so I observe these behaviors in the real world the way I observed the characters in the book - from the outside. The novel opens with a George Eliot quote, and it's fitting, because it reads like a modern take on introspective love stories of the past, that turn a critical lens on a specific demographic and studies their interactions with each other. But its star is the modern anti-hero.
Nate is a typical cerebral guy, raised by a feminist mother to flourish in an artistic world. Guys like this are kind of wolves in sheep's clothing - they have a progressive, equality-infused worldview, but they can't seem to apply that to the way they act on a micro level, in their personal lives. Or maybe the assume because they're an artistic, liberal anti-bro, they're already gaining points in the dating world without having to put in any of the actual work to reflect their beliefs in their personalities. They're like the hipster version of the nice guy - an angry Seth Cohen or Zach Braff maybe.
Most reviews of this book say that Hannah is the first woman Nate meets who he perceives as his intellectual equal. I think it's probably true that this is the first woman he's willing to accept as his intellectual equal, or maybe who wasn't afraid to keep herself firmly planted on his intellectual level, whereas the other women he dated withered and gave in underneath the pressure of his moody, contrary personality. One of the problems with men like this, as suggested by Nate's inability to understand the women around him, is that they can't or won't accept that women often have similar objectives in relationships, or that women want the same thing out of relationships. The conflict this constantly creates, as men who stop wondering whether the problem is their own and keep racing from girl to girl as if to somehow erase the problems of their past relationships, is the focus of this novel. It's not a plot-driven novel, it's a character study. We're meant to see shreds of ourselves in the characters and wonder how we'd react in their lives. Adelle Waldman is so perceptive and masterful at inhabiting her characters and predicting what they'll do next that the portrait is so realistic, biting and engaging, especially for people who fall in the demographic she's skewering.
Nate is a typical cerebral guy, raised by a feminist mother to flourish in an artistic world. Guys like this are kind of wolves in sheep's clothing - they have a progressive, equality-infused worldview, but they can't seem to apply that to the way they act on a micro level, in their personal lives. Or maybe the assume because they're an artistic, liberal anti-bro, they're already gaining points in the dating world without having to put in any of the actual work to reflect their beliefs in their personalities. They're like the hipster version of the nice guy - an angry Seth Cohen or Zach Braff maybe.
Most reviews of this book say that Hannah is the first woman Nate meets who he perceives as his intellectual equal. I think it's probably true that this is the first woman he's willing to accept as his intellectual equal, or maybe who wasn't afraid to keep herself firmly planted on his intellectual level, whereas the other women he dated withered and gave in underneath the pressure of his moody, contrary personality. One of the problems with men like this, as suggested by Nate's inability to understand the women around him, is that they can't or won't accept that women often have similar objectives in relationships, or that women want the same thing out of relationships. The conflict this constantly creates, as men who stop wondering whether the problem is their own and keep racing from girl to girl as if to somehow erase the problems of their past relationships, is the focus of this novel. It's not a plot-driven novel, it's a character study. We're meant to see shreds of ourselves in the characters and wonder how we'd react in their lives. Adelle Waldman is so perceptive and masterful at inhabiting her characters and predicting what they'll do next that the portrait is so realistic, biting and engaging, especially for people who fall in the demographic she's skewering.
As a comedy of manners, this book is great. Weldman has such a command of language, a wonderful sense for when to shift the dynamic of a scene with a single, short line. The accuracy of this book, however, troubles me, leaves me sad that people like Nate may and probably do exist. Though by no means a terrible person, his behavior towards other people is despicable. The description of this book as a comedy of manners in a generation without any manners at all seems perfectly fitting. But this book scares me into thinking some in my generation may be wandering missing not only their manners, but their souls.
It seems possible to me that you could argue for hours about many aspects of this book but the truth is thIs book is pretty great. Well-written fiction is always welcome in my world.
Very beautifully written. As much as Nate can be a bit of a jerk from time to time, I can’t help but like his character. The arrogance. The loneliness. The words. The need for friends and women to serve as entertainment.
I really enjoyed this book. The vocabulary itself excited me and gave me that real writer living in brooklyn feel. I feel like I know Nate in real life. Getting to know Nate through his own accounts and feelings was interesting. It confirmed many things I think men think but don’t always say... or at least some of the guys I know.
I also like how the tale moves so smoothly through Nate’s day to day and recaps his past in great detail. We really get a fully developed Nate and an understanding of why he is the way he is even when it isn’t being said outright. Great read!
I really enjoyed this book. The vocabulary itself excited me and gave me that real writer living in brooklyn feel. I feel like I know Nate in real life. Getting to know Nate through his own accounts and feelings was interesting. It confirmed many things I think men think but don’t always say... or at least some of the guys I know.
I also like how the tale moves so smoothly through Nate’s day to day and recaps his past in great detail. We really get a fully developed Nate and an understanding of why he is the way he is even when it isn’t being said outright. Great read!
There are not many times that I've had an emotional reaction to a book like this one. I kept changing sides on just how I felt about it, one minute getting very upset at what felt like cheap shots at my gender, the next admiring a portrayal of the simple deception of a male mind at work, the next peevishly setting my nook down and muttering "Dammit, that's low. But, true." While there is no way for me to really connect completely with this novel (You'd have to be a writer and/or live in New York for that), I think this is a pretty good look at how (some) modern males go through dating. And the main character, Nate, feels like an a-hole, but not one you would imprint as such right away. He feels like one of those guys who, the first time you meet him (male or female), you thinks he's great, but slowly that high opinion gets eroded as his facade, and interest in what you think, fades away. The only complaint I have with the book is that Hannah, Nate's girlfriend through most of the book, seems like she is a little too innocently presented. That was my biggest struggle with the book, she does nothing to deserve the crap unloaded on her by Nate, and I'm not sure if Waldman does that on purpose to make sure that, at the end, your alliance is on the preferred side. To be fair, Waldman doesn't portray all the females in the book like that. As you learn more about the women in Nate's past, roads get connected, lights turn on, and you start to realize why he is how he is. And when he finally ends up with a much more attractive, and emotionally combative partner, that does seem like where he should have been the whole time. I read this book quickly, and since finishing a couple of days ago, have not stopped pondering why it got under my skin. It may just be an instinctual reaction to an attack on my team. It could be that Waldman is actually being unfair, loading the decks before the game. But I love how much this book made me question every little moment for what it meant. It's not a comforting read, but a worthy one, certainly.
Entitled, pretentious, not well-paced, and anticlimactic.