I only read this because Ayelet Waldman is married to Michael Chabon and because I had heard about the controversy she generated when she published an article saying she loved her husband more than her children. Curiosity got the better of me. I agree with her basic premise - that it is impossible to be a 'good mother' by our culture's standards (we're criticized for staying home, for working, for being too strict, for being too permissive etc.) and that we need to relax and be 'good enough' or 'not too bad'. But honestly, she's neurotic - and suffers from the 'Too Much Information' syndrome. I wouldn't recommend this one.

I found the author's raw honesty both refreshing and mildly disturbing. She says things in this book that I might not ever say to anyone else, just keep those thoughts in my head. Yet I understood all of it, and when I could, I empathized, and in other parts I sympathized. And I laughed. There is plenty of humor spread throughout, and it made me boggle that some people got so very upset over what Ayelet has written/said previously.

The book is an easy read, and one that I looked forward to lying down with each night. It was like having a long chat with a really open and sharing and funny girlfriend. If you are a mother, don't take yourself too seriously and have an open mind, give this one a try, you won't be sorry.

PS to my MIL--thank you for the personalized, autographed copy. I will keep it forever. :)

I loved this book. I think the title isn't a great choice for the book, however. It led me to think it would be a snarky, humorous book and there certainly is plenty of humor in it, but it is SO MUCH MORE than that. These 18 essays are written from the heart and show so many emotions and opinions that many women share, but often are afraid to express. Highly recommend this book.

I didn't know much about the author before reading this. My son actually picked this book for me off the new releases shelf at the library. I laughed when he handed it to me but decided it was worth checking out. Really glad I did. While I can't give it 5 stars - the author's voice did grate on me at times -- overall it was a page turner. Waldman is often brutally honest about her experiences as a bipolar mother of 4. I cried when I read the chapter about how her newborn almost starved to death from an undiagnosed palate problem and her struggles to breastfeed him, and also the chapter about her considering an abortion after an amnio showed a potentially serious problem. I also found her discussion of the impossible ideal of what constitutes a Good Mother and how other mothers are often the cruelest enforcers of it sadly accurate. Not recommended for conservatives as she is definitely coming from the far left in her viewpoints, but if that doesn't put you off, it's a good read.

Yes, part of the time she was annoying. However, she also says what the rest of us mothers are thinking. You know what? So many of us are bad mothers. Our kids are going to turn out okay, though.

Hmm...I read this very quickly; within 24 hours, I guess. But did I like it? I'm not sure. There was definitely some oversharing--do I really need to know what kind of condoms Waldman and her famous novelist husband use? And seriously, ok, I get it, Michael Chabon is the most perfect husband in the history of the world and the rest of us are doomed to a life of misery, sucky sex lives and un-equal domestic duties. Really, you don't have to beat us over the head with it every page.

That said, I felt Waldman made some good points about how society, and especially other women, judge mothers for the choices they've made, the actions they've taken, even the way they choose to give birth. Gave me some interesting things to think about...

Ayelet Waldman likes herself very very much. I indentified with some of her anecdotes, but her neuroses ruined much of this book for me.

I started this book on audio and it was excellent. However, I can read faster than I can listen and I felt like my listening time would be better spent on another book.

I thought this book had some interesting insights into parenting now. I am actually grateful (having read this) that the Internet was not as important when Bill and I were rearing our children. Of course, Waldman is rearing her children in Berkeley CA, which is a far cry from Ashland in many, many ways.

I enjoy hearing about other people's lives. I think Waldman would define me as nosy not a snoop. So that aspect of the book was interesting to me. Overall I am glad I read this even though I found some other books about motherhood to be more insightful.

I am curious about how this book will go over in our book group. It could be well received or it could become part of the Mommy wars. Hard to tell.


Not what I was expecting. I thought this book would be funny, but it was much more judge-y instead.

Although the Rocketship chapter did make me cry and I appreciate the author's openness regarding mental illness. However, too much political rhetoric, complaining and blaming things on her childhood/mother made the book unenjoyable overall.

This was a brave and very open book. Waldman writes about the most personal parts of her life, from her abortion to her bipolar disorder. There's a lot here to comfort anyone who has shared some of the same struggles. The writing is generally accessible and funny, too, although it does occasionally fall flat (she way overused the "After all, I live in _Berkeley_" line, for example).