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bookishmillennial's review against another edition
challenging
dark
emotional
funny
informative
reflective
sad
fast-paced
disclaimer: I don’t really give starred reviews. I hope my reviews provide enough information to let you know if a book is for you or not. Find me here: https://linktr.ee/bookishmillennial
I also just especially do not like to rate memoirs, as I am a fervent believer in everyone being able to share their stories. I listened to the audiobook (thank you Libby!) and it was about ~5 hours, so it kept me company on my 5 hour flight hehe.
Randa Jarrar's narration in the audiobook was phenomenal - she was dry, cutting, and vulgar without abandon. Randa is a fat, queer, Arab American who refuses to apologize for who she is, and I applaud her. This book covered stories ranging from her childhood to now, covering the abuse she endured, not only by her family, but by romantic and sexual partners. She also describes the rampant fatphobia, xenophobia, racism, and doxxing she experienced by being so outspoken and uncensored in her thoughts on American politics especially. It all rang so familiar to me, not because I share identities with RJ (I'm not Arab, not Muslim, not fat), but mostly because it certainly seems as if most folks are perpetually trying to knock femmes down a peg, to "remember their place" so to speak.
I appreciate that Randa Jarrar spoke so boldly and honestly about her life, and am grateful to have read through her reflections. Some were incredibly graphic and uncomfortable, but I hope she found some solace and peace in sharing this all with the world.
I also just especially do not like to rate memoirs, as I am a fervent believer in everyone being able to share their stories. I listened to the audiobook (thank you Libby!) and it was about ~5 hours, so it kept me company on my 5 hour flight hehe.
Randa Jarrar's narration in the audiobook was phenomenal - she was dry, cutting, and vulgar without abandon. Randa is a fat, queer, Arab American who refuses to apologize for who she is, and I applaud her. This book covered stories ranging from her childhood to now, covering the abuse she endured, not only by her family, but by romantic and sexual partners. She also describes the rampant fatphobia, xenophobia, racism, and doxxing she experienced by being so outspoken and uncensored in her thoughts on American politics especially. It all rang so familiar to me, not because I share identities with RJ (I'm not Arab, not Muslim, not fat), but mostly because it certainly seems as if most folks are perpetually trying to knock femmes down a peg, to "remember their place" so to speak.
I appreciate that Randa Jarrar spoke so boldly and honestly about her life, and am grateful to have read through her reflections. Some were incredibly graphic and uncomfortable, but I hope she found some solace and peace in sharing this all with the world.
Content Warnings
Graphic: Medical content, Child abuse, Sexual content, Fatphobia, Domestic abuse, and Vomit
Moderate: Islamophobia, War, Bullying, Xenophobia, Racism, Sexism, Infidelity, and Emotional abuse
khaufnaak's review
3.0
2 and 4 stars at the same time. The writing is dry, reflections on war are jarringly juxtaposed with recollections of sex. An oddly Freudian memoir. This is the author’s memoir, and the cross-country aspect is not incredibly pertinent. So, it is incredibly difficult to review, because this is not just a book, this is the story of a real person’s life.
2 stars because, I cringed a lot, especially in the beginning. Because of the war next to the sex, because she seemed like the mocked at caricature of the liberal. Very sensitive, often lamenting, and living rather lavishly. As the memoir continued, these things because contextualized. She was not living lavishly, she was not wealthy, she just enjoyed things sometimes. And maybe she is so sensitive because she has suffered so much. The sex was next to the violence because they were so tightly intertwined for her.
4 stars because, I see myself in her. In many ways, I could’ve been her, I could become her. The details of child abuse, pregnancy, domestic abuse. The desire for her parents’ love, how she reconnects with them in the end. The sense of hope that her family eventually sort of accepted her. I did get tears in my eyes at the end.
2 stars because, I cringed a lot, especially in the beginning. Because of the war next to the sex, because she seemed like the mocked at caricature of the liberal. Very sensitive, often lamenting, and living rather lavishly. As the memoir continued, these things because contextualized. She was not living lavishly, she was not wealthy, she just enjoyed things sometimes. And maybe she is so sensitive because she has suffered so much. The sex was next to the violence because they were so tightly intertwined for her.
4 stars because, I see myself in her. In many ways, I could’ve been her, I could become her. The details of child abuse, pregnancy, domestic abuse. The desire for her parents’ love, how she reconnects with them in the end. The sense of hope that her family eventually sort of accepted her. I did get tears in my eyes at the end.
moonyreadsbystarlight's review against another edition
emotional
reflective
4.25
This memoir covers many parts of the author's life, going from moments during her travel, to her childhood, to her relationships as an adult. She weaves them together, discussing pain and violence from these different parts of her life, but also pleasure and healing.
She speaks candidly about racism and fatphobia that she experiences from stragers, but also violence from her parents as a child and partners as an adult. The violence of a homeland she can no longer visit and of a home that was too hostile to return to. She also speaks of the relationships and small interactions that have facilitated he healing, from the kindness of strangers to reconciliation, to entering the world of kink.
This was well-written and engaging. I listened to the audiobook over the course of just a couple of days.
She speaks candidly about racism and fatphobia that she experiences from stragers, but also violence from her parents as a child and partners as an adult. The violence of a homeland she can no longer visit and of a home that was too hostile to return to. She also speaks of the relationships and small interactions that have facilitated he healing, from the kindness of strangers to reconciliation, to entering the world of kink.
This was well-written and engaging. I listened to the audiobook over the course of just a couple of days.
Content Warnings
Graphic: Physical abuse, Infidelity, Domestic abuse, Body shaming, Sexual harassment, Sexual violence, Xenophobia, Toxic relationship, Sexual content, Sexism, Racism, and Child abuse
Moderate: Abortion
Explicit discussion of kink and BDSMsahanac's review
challenging
dark
emotional
slow-paced
2.5
meandering, hard to decipher the point. felt like the shock factor mattered more than the story at some points, to a distracting degree. i tore thru it and i appreciate the politics of this one, but perhaps the bold-faced brashness jarrar delights in is made for bolder folks than me
xanthao's review
medium-paced
5.0
I listened to this as an audiobook. I really enjoyed her storytelling and her approach to her sexuality and her identity. This is a good read.
selinaleona_'s review against another edition
challenging
dark
emotional
funny
informative
reflective
sad
tense
medium-paced
5.0
amyjo25's review against another edition
adventurous
dark
emotional
reflective
sad
fast-paced
4.75
Content Warnings
Graphic: Domestic abuse and Child abuse
Moderate: Racism