Reviews

Hard to Love: Essays and Confessions by Briallen Hopper

horfhorfhorf's review against another edition

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2.0

Much preferred her essays on non-romantic relationships.

fpachec0g's review against another edition

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challenging emotional hopeful inspiring mysterious reflective sad tense medium-paced

4.75

katimae's review against another edition

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reflective slow-paced

3.25

aliciasantiago's review against another edition

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4.0

This is one of those rare essay books that got better and better every time I picked it up. The interwoven confessions were refreshingly intimate. I can’t wait to recommend this book.

rachelsmith3773's review

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emotional reflective medium-paced

3.25

anywhoozle's review against another edition

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4.0

~3.5 stars

sam8834's review against another edition

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4.0

What drew me to Briallen Hopper's collection was its overarching theme of a chosen or found family - a rejection of the dichotomous get-married-or-die-alone life template and an exploration of the romances that exist outside it. To place sole importance on the traditional romantic relationship seems a disservice to the potential that friendships have to be intimate and life-changing, and Hopper recounts many instances of friendships that have shaped her life, including caring for a friend with cancer and moving in with another who is at a very different place in life. Her essay "Moby Dick" is my favorite, a painful, eye-opening account of Hopper's ongoing fertility journey, and I appreciate her candor in talking openly about what it's like to try to have a baby outside the confines of couplehood. As less people are deciding to get married and more are choosing to stay single, I suspect this will be a widely referenced collection on platonic love in years to come.

jenna0010's review against another edition

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5.0

Briallen Hopper`s essays are vulnerable and honest. Every bit of this I clung to. I loved the essay about wanting babies. I loved the essay about grief. I saw so much of myself in these words.

fragilecapricorn's review against another edition

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emotional funny hopeful inspiring lighthearted reflective relaxing sad medium-paced

5.0

christythelibrarian's review against another edition

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4.0

My favorite essays: “Lean On”, “On Spinsters”, “Remembering How It Felt to Burn”, “Hoarding”, “Moby-Dick”.

I read and re-read “On Spinsters” years ago online, and it’s the reason I bought this book because I wanted to hear more from this writer about building a life with her friends. The collection is at its best when it’s more memoir. The way she told the story of a difficult time in a friendship in “Hoarding” was really empathetic and well done. I was thinking about that essay for a while.

I have some similarities with the author - single, white, late 30s, some aspects of her religious journey. So there were parts that resonated personally. But also I enjoyed reading about the differences too - she prefers to have roommates, she wants to be a mom, she works in academia, she has a very different family dynamic than mine, etc. “Moby-Dick” - about her efforts to be a mom - had such a great fun structure to it while also being a poignant reflection on those efforts.

The essays that were heavier on describing a movie or tv show were not as interesting to me but maybe they would have been if they were movies or tv shows I had seen. I skipped the Cheers essay because I haven’t seen the show (the only essay I skipped.)

But overall the favorite essays make this collection well worth the read and place on my bookshelf.