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aismt's review against another edition
3.0
3.5
A good introduction to covert incest, focuses mainly on covert incest between “opposite sex” parents and their children with little exploration of surrogacy partner relationships between the “same sex” parent and child. The implications of covert incest on queer relationships is not considered / overlooked besides one question in the FAQ relating to gay men being their mothers surrogate partner.
The book spends a lot of time talking about the relationship between adult sexual addiction and the experience of covert incest in childhood, I feel like the potential for sexual repulsion was never mentioned.
Still feel the book has useful information and can be enlightening if you identify with the issues brought forth in the book, at the same time it doesn’t leave you with much to process any “ick” feelings that might arrive from re-examining your familial relationships through the lens of covert incest.
Also many of the suggestions involve 12 step programs or reconnecting with one or both parents - I feel the book could benefit from including solutions that don’t involve reopening potentially harmful or abusive relationships
A good introduction to covert incest, focuses mainly on covert incest between “opposite sex” parents and their children with little exploration of surrogacy partner relationships between the “same sex” parent and child. The implications of covert incest on queer relationships is not considered / overlooked besides one question in the FAQ relating to gay men being their mothers surrogate partner.
The book spends a lot of time talking about the relationship between adult sexual addiction and the experience of covert incest in childhood, I feel like the potential for sexual repulsion was never mentioned.
Still feel the book has useful information and can be enlightening if you identify with the issues brought forth in the book, at the same time it doesn’t leave you with much to process any “ick” feelings that might arrive from re-examining your familial relationships through the lens of covert incest.
Also many of the suggestions involve 12 step programs or reconnecting with one or both parents - I feel the book could benefit from including solutions that don’t involve reopening potentially harmful or abusive relationships
gbonesy's review against another edition
3.0
not as helpful for victims of same sex parental enmeshment/parentification/abuse, but still has some good kernels of truth.
banxehe's review
emotional
informative
sad
fast-paced
4.0
I suppose I always knew what happened. I just wasn't aware of the ways in which I was compensating for it, reliving it and punishing myself in the present. More detailed, resonant and insightful than the Emotional Incest Syndrome. Read in tandem with Lust, Anger, Love by Maureen Canning and Anti-Oedipus by Deleuze & Guattari as a palate cleanser from the heteronormative framework and borderline psychoanalytic approach surrounding most of the literature on this topic.
hopeevey's review
3.0
This book was suggested to me in a forum for Adult Survivors of Child Abuse. The author seems more familiar with male victims of covert incest, and tends to focus on victims dealing with addictions. It's also a very short work - more an overview of what covert incest is than a thorough examination of it. That all being said, it is a good, basic overview. I'm neither male, nor dealing with an active addiction, but still saw myself in this book. That it's a short work becomes an advantage - a victim in denial might not be willing to read a longer work, but may well see themselves in this one.
I prefer to find suggestions and ideas for recovery in books aimed at adult children of abuse/neglect/dysfunction, which this book is light on. There are suggestions, but they're almost too vague to be helpful. However, this book would be a good place to start for someone looking into the topic of covert incest.
brioche's review against another edition
4.0
A very rare insight on the enmeshment - a largely tabu problem of parent-child relationship.
xgebi's review
1.0
I have read more than handful of books about recovery from child abuse. This one was different, not just because it focuses on covert and overt sexual child abuse, I have read couple of books which touch this subject, it was full of personal stories, not many generalizations. It was hard to read because of the style.
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