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shannanh's review against another edition
4.0
It was very interesting up until the end. One woman's story into her life and the day she finds out she is actually a woman of color.
danicapage's review against another edition
3.0
Disclaimer: By making this comment, I’m not trying to denigrate the author or her experience. It seems like her relationship with her mother was complicated and that her mother lied often and frequently and purposely hid the truth. While I don’t think this was the author’s intent, some comments came across a little bit victim blaming. No two people experience rape the same way or react the same. And trauma can make it difficult for people to remember things. Somebody having sex with somebody who is passed out is rape, somebody having sex with somebody they drugged is raped, and somebody could have been in a relationship with somebody/gone to a party with them and even liked them and still been raped.
I don’t think the author’s intent was to say otherwise, but how certain things were said made it seem so. I think it was meant to reflect and show her tumultuous and problematic relationship with her mom and her mom’s story alone. But I can’t leave a review and not start with that.
Warnings: I don’t feel like there are too many warnings to give here: racism, sexual assault/rape/mental illness, some tame sexual content.
I don’t know what to make of this book in some ways. A lot of reviewers are saying and criticizing the author for not realizing and figuring out she was Black sooner. I think that’s unfair for the reasons the author explains throughout the book. Memoirs are always hard for me to rate. I felt some of the pacing and what she chose to focus on was off. For example, the lengthy description of a wedding. I listened to audio, so I can’t comment on errors or anything like that.
I also felt this memoir in many ways was very moving and poignant. I never felt completely hooked or captivated, but it was an intriguing read.
I don’t think the author’s intent was to say otherwise, but how certain things were said made it seem so. I think it was meant to reflect and show her tumultuous and problematic relationship with her mom and her mom’s story alone. But I can’t leave a review and not start with that.
Warnings: I don’t feel like there are too many warnings to give here: racism, sexual assault/rape/mental illness, some tame sexual content.
I don’t know what to make of this book in some ways. A lot of reviewers are saying and criticizing the author for not realizing and figuring out she was Black sooner. I think that’s unfair for the reasons the author explains throughout the book. Memoirs are always hard for me to rate. I felt some of the pacing and what she chose to focus on was off. For example, the lengthy description of a wedding. I listened to audio, so I can’t comment on errors or anything like that.
I also felt this memoir in many ways was very moving and poignant. I never felt completely hooked or captivated, but it was an intriguing read.
freder1ck's review against another edition
4.0
Beautifully written memoir. The author is biracial, but through family insistence, was raised as white in the United States where racial identity is related to everything. To the people who ask how she didn't embrace her biracial heritage until she was 27, the memoir makes clear (as with family secrets generally) that she did have a certain awareness. If your mother is the keeper of your memories and identities, who do you believe when your mother tells you one thing and everyone else tells you another thing? Love and acceptance are only adequate when they embrace the whole person, omitting nothing.
eclairemars's review against another edition
2.0
Great start, but then over-politicized and mono-dimensional
sarahfett's review against another edition
3.0
I had a hard time deciding how to rate this book. The author has a fascinating story to tell with important insights into race and identity in America. But this book is in need of a lot of editing. At times the narrative is choppy without enough details to be able to follow the story, but in other places it is overly verbose. I did read an ARC, but they are usually in better shape this close to publication. I'll hold out hope that a good editor goes through it before it is published because it is a 5 star story that everyone could benefit from reading.
I received an ARC from NetGalley. The book will be released on August 6, 2019.
I received an ARC from NetGalley. The book will be released on August 6, 2019.
assisiminded's review against another edition
4.0
I appreciated this very thoughtful consideration of identity, family, and how race is perceived and realized in the United States.
kahale's review against another edition
4.0
A young woman finds out when she is 27 years old that she is the daughter of a Black man rather than the father she knew all her life. She talks about going through her life but with a very different point of view. Some very interesting ideas about dealing with people of various races. I had never known about the paper bag test. Does a person of color with lighter skin tone judge a person with darker skin?
determinator's review against another edition
5.0
A poignant book about being biracial when one doesn’t know one half of their family, and the ramifications of being raised white at the erasure of an entire half of their identity. Sarah’s journey reflects many mixed race people’s experiences—the doubt, guilt, not fitting in, downright dissociation and ambiguity.
A lot of the segments in this book hit me deeply. I related a lot to the entire experience.
I’d recommend this to biracial people in general, but especially those whose families hid their heritage, or those who simply don’t know one half of it. It has a bittersweet ending, but to me is well worth the read.
If you’re white, it may not be as useful or satisfying to you.
A lot of the segments in this book hit me deeply. I related a lot to the entire experience.
I’d recommend this to biracial people in general, but especially those whose families hid their heritage, or those who simply don’t know one half of it. It has a bittersweet ending, but to me is well worth the read.
If you’re white, it may not be as useful or satisfying to you.