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dianafraser17's review against another edition
dark
reflective
sad
tense
medium-paced
2.75
This was a weird, dark graphic novel. I really liked the entry point but the overall book lacked depth and felt a bit ping-pong. The author spends the most time on two scientific studies about loneliness that are pretty awful, and it ends on a sad note, so there's more musings than thoughtful reflections overall.
Not a recommendation from me, but I'm glad to read something outside my comfort zone.
Not a recommendation from me, but I'm glad to read something outside my comfort zone.
martinamarier's review against another edition
2.0
didn't like the art style and there were too many words on each page for my lazy brain that just wanted to look at pictures
chenyinyin's review against another edition
4.5
i enjoyed the way the author talked about many different things and the flow of her writing. her prose was great.
the art style wasn’t my favorite though, so i deducted half a star.
the art style wasn’t my favorite though, so i deducted half a star.
audreysova's review against another edition
4.0
This book made me think so much all throughout. Loneliness is something I've felt myself and also something that feels palpable in every room that I'm in. While not uniquely an American problem, this is an interesting read focused on the American loneliness experience. The author interweaves some of her personal experience with research on the topic. The imagery is beautiful and the information shared will definitely be lingering with me for some time.
johnbeige's review against another edition
1.0
Seek You is a collection of essays with a loose through-line - experiences with loneliness and how it impacts one’s actions. The author frequently slips into describing loneliness in a particularly romantic tone, almost tragically sexy, something that frequently pops up in memoirs but doesn’t seem particularly motivated here beyond the author’s personal ennui.
There are dozens of places where the author could have gone more in depth. At one point, 1950s consumer culture and suburbs are mentioned, but the explicit racism of the GI Bill that led to these suburbs being created is not addressed. In fact one will find little discussion of how relationships are created or formed by the society they exist in. More ink could be spilled on how our early lives are structured around compulsory socialization in schools, but when school ends most are suddenly abandoned without anchor or training for developing relationships outside that context. Could have discussed how types of labor changed to be steadily more isolated (from line work to service work to working at home at a desk), and how this transition was sold to workers as something that would improve their lives, much like the labor-saving tools the author mentioned in the section about consumer culture.
How does one spin a mass shooting in Vegas into a story about oneself and one’s feelings towards their husband? A mindblowingly self-centered state of mind, sold to the reader as being based in a concern for others. This is not an appropriate place to include additional discourse about how self-defense is mandatory for oppressed peoples if they don’t want to be mowed down by oppressors, something ignored by the author amidst their denunciation of firearms. For further reading on this question I would recommend Pacifism as Pathology, Negros With Guns and This Nonviolent Shit Will Get You Killed.
Pg 186 refers to combing through popular xyngas to copy their formatting and redo their success. It occurs to me that this author might simply be narcissistic, or perhaps it’s another aspect of the self-romanticization of loneliness
Pg 201-202 discusses bowling alone - a book about the death of civic institutions like bridge clubs. Could be aided by author talking about why this happened - change in economy towards atomization. Author could point to previous mass labor organizing and party clubs as evidence of a long and slow death of society, and not run into the issue of assuming everyone who talks about tech changing society is a 1950s loving reactionary right before saying tech is a scapegoat. Similarly, they could talk about Nickled and Dimed as a means of explaining the commodification of emotional labor, though an offhand mention of sex work does occur on p 299
P 291 refers to loneliness as transmitable up to three nodes away, which leaves me curious about how this interacts with attachment styles, but nothing is offered as an explanation here. P 320 old people like stuffed animals, this might be bad, author proposes no solution
Finally a solution is proposed. It follows in its entirety: “I want us to use loneliness - yours and mine - to find our way back to each other. I want us to play songs for each other on the radio. And when we call out across an airwave or telephone or chat room or app or city street or open field or our bedroom, I want us to hear, miraculously, a voice calling back.”
Unfortunately the author also dedicated two sections of the text to how having people in your life doesn’t make you not lonely.
The book is easily 200 pages longer than it needs to be, and were it not for the art I suspect an editor would have recommended the cut. As is, the format uniqueness a graphic novel offers is rarely if ever taken advantage of, and the art itself is rather bland and uninspired.
All in all, quite dreadful.
There are dozens of places where the author could have gone more in depth. At one point, 1950s consumer culture and suburbs are mentioned, but the explicit racism of the GI Bill that led to these suburbs being created is not addressed. In fact one will find little discussion of how relationships are created or formed by the society they exist in. More ink could be spilled on how our early lives are structured around compulsory socialization in schools, but when school ends most are suddenly abandoned without anchor or training for developing relationships outside that context. Could have discussed how types of labor changed to be steadily more isolated (from line work to service work to working at home at a desk), and how this transition was sold to workers as something that would improve their lives, much like the labor-saving tools the author mentioned in the section about consumer culture.
How does one spin a mass shooting in Vegas into a story about oneself and one’s feelings towards their husband? A mindblowingly self-centered state of mind, sold to the reader as being based in a concern for others. This is not an appropriate place to include additional discourse about how self-defense is mandatory for oppressed peoples if they don’t want to be mowed down by oppressors, something ignored by the author amidst their denunciation of firearms. For further reading on this question I would recommend Pacifism as Pathology, Negros With Guns and This Nonviolent Shit Will Get You Killed.
Pg 186 refers to combing through popular xyngas to copy their formatting and redo their success. It occurs to me that this author might simply be narcissistic, or perhaps it’s another aspect of the self-romanticization of loneliness
Pg 201-202 discusses bowling alone - a book about the death of civic institutions like bridge clubs. Could be aided by author talking about why this happened - change in economy towards atomization. Author could point to previous mass labor organizing and party clubs as evidence of a long and slow death of society, and not run into the issue of assuming everyone who talks about tech changing society is a 1950s loving reactionary right before saying tech is a scapegoat. Similarly, they could talk about Nickled and Dimed as a means of explaining the commodification of emotional labor, though an offhand mention of sex work does occur on p 299
P 291 refers to loneliness as transmitable up to three nodes away, which leaves me curious about how this interacts with attachment styles, but nothing is offered as an explanation here. P 320 old people like stuffed animals, this might be bad, author proposes no solution
Finally a solution is proposed. It follows in its entirety: “I want us to use loneliness - yours and mine - to find our way back to each other. I want us to play songs for each other on the radio. And when we call out across an airwave or telephone or chat room or app or city street or open field or our bedroom, I want us to hear, miraculously, a voice calling back.”
Unfortunately the author also dedicated two sections of the text to how having people in your life doesn’t make you not lonely.
The book is easily 200 pages longer than it needs to be, and were it not for the art I suspect an editor would have recommended the cut. As is, the format uniqueness a graphic novel offers is rarely if ever taken advantage of, and the art itself is rather bland and uninspired.
All in all, quite dreadful.
cheye13's review against another edition
reflective
sad
fast-paced
3.0
I really appreciated the narrative here, particularly with the research, but it felt like so much dimension was missing. We cover the generic American male and female, but never branch out into other spheres of loneliness – lgbtq, bipoc, children, prisoners. Arguably, that was not what the book was attempting to do, given the structure of the project, but it is what the synopsis implied. Ultimately, this book simply whet my appetite for a more comprehensive, traditionally written study of the topic.
All that being said, this is a very effective and evocative project. It's exceptionally well-researched and structured well. While there is no offered solution past the examination and acceptance of the phenomenon of American loneliness, it does reach out a hand to hold. This book ultimately validates a lot of emotions stemming from isolation and offers: we are not alone in our loneliness. It's not much, but we've gotta start somewhere.
All that being said, this is a very effective and evocative project. It's exceptionally well-researched and structured well. While there is no offered solution past the examination and acceptance of the phenomenon of American loneliness, it does reach out a hand to hold. This book ultimately validates a lot of emotions stemming from isolation and offers: we are not alone in our loneliness. It's not much, but we've gotta start somewhere.
Content Warnings
Graphic: Animal cruelty
Moderate: Mass/school shootings
Minor: Death and Grief
no graphic imagery is shown, but there are brief but graphic descriptions of animal abuse in a research context.chelseamguy's review against another edition
3.0
Did not feel particularly hopeful to me, which I desperately wanted an upturn three-quarters through, but it's more of a plea, and I feel that. Actually reach out and reach back, it'll be messy sometimes but it's all we have, ok?
kyriannaj's review against another edition
challenging
emotional
informative
reflective
sad
medium-paced
2.75
This book felt like the beginning part of a journey, not the whole journey. There's little hope or encouraging parts to hold on to in all the lonely darkness this book deals with. It's clearly an incredibly well researched piece, but with how heavy and dark the content can become, I wish more research was done to show us how to reconnect among this loneliness. Many times I felt it was building to something, or there was the start of a beautiful concept, only to be abruptly cut off and the topic changed leaving the book feeling disjointed. While this isn't the fault of the author's, due to it being written pre-COVID there is no mention of it other than the beginning author's note. Which left the whole book feeling very 'small scale' compared to what the world had just experienced.
The last 100 pages or so were incredibly difficult to read, especially with imagery. It's about Harry Harlow's monkey experiments, which I struggle to understand why they were necessary to include in the first place, at such a graphic level.
The last 100 pages or so were incredibly difficult to read, especially with imagery. It's about Harry Harlow's monkey experiments, which I struggle to understand why they were necessary to include in the first place, at such a graphic level.
Content Warnings
Graphic: Mental illness, Animal death, Animal cruelty, and Child abuse
Moderate: Alcohol, Alcoholism, Death, Gore, Injury/Injury detail, Mass/school shootings, and Medical content
Minor: Pandemic/Epidemic, Cancer, Chronic illness, Misogyny, Rape, Sexism, and Abortion