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jessaca_with_an_a's review
1.0
I have a hard time giving any book a bad review because just because it didn’t work for me, doesn’t mean it wouldn’t work for someone else. I’ve LOVED books that have received terrible ratings, and hated others with sparkling reviews. So keep that in mind as you read this review.
If you’re a snob for prose *raises hand*, then Dorothy and the Cane of Destiny is a letdown. Within the prologue alone, the writing itself bored me enough that I nearly stopped reading. The wording was clunky and unedited (misspellings, sentence structure errors), like I was reading from a first draft, not a published novel. I can forgive some mistakes if the rest of the writing is otherwise exciting or interesting. But this wasn’t. Take for example the lines, “The warm southern air was damp, but comfortably still. It was nearly always nice and warm down in Florida...” If a writer has to use the descriptor “warm” twice within a two sentence span, it makes me question their skills as a writer, but more importantly, neither of these sentences do much for the imagination. I literally felt like a drooling baby while reading most of this book because it took no brainpower to do so. ”He was naked as the day he was born, and using his hands to wash under his armpits. Like he was taking a bath.” Ugh! There’s so much hand-holding and “telling”, it hurts!
Granted, with a title like Dorothy and the Cane of Destiny, you aren’t selecting this read for the intellectual challenge, but rather because you’re looking to have a mindlessly silly time. And if you have the sense of humor of a fourteen-year-old boy, it delivers.
All of the elderly in Dorothy and the Cane of Destiny are portrayed as crotchety trickster caricatures who think poop jokes are hilarious. They’re not given any humility or wisdom, making them very one-dimensional and reinforcing stereotypes of “senile” or “angry” or “clueless” old people. It’s offensive to those of us who have watched loved ones deteriorate or be shamed for a variety of aging related experiences, but again, to people with the humor of a teenage boy, maybe it’s hilarious?
More specifically, let’s look at Dorothy and Walt. Cue the old-couple-that-bickers trope. Not just “bickers”, but Dorothy and Walter downright put each other down on a regular basis. Calling each other fat, wrinkly, and deaf. Some might argue, “People do that when they’re older though. They take cheap shots because it doesn’t actually offend them anymore.” I know what you’re talking about, and this wasn’t that. Both Walter and Dorothy were offended by each other’s constant criticisms, and if they’ve been together for 57 years, then this might just be the most toxic and dysfunctional relationship I’ve ever seen.
Not much can be said about the other two characters, Ferdinand and Forrest. Although Forrest was likable, his interactions and dialogue always felt like an afterthought. And Ferdinand? About 99% of his contributions to the story were fart or poop related. ”Ferdinand farted, which ended in a few wet bubbly sounds. He smiled.” Yup, you read that right! And you can look forward to about a dozen other gems like this...
The things I did like: 1.) The cover!; 2.) That the book began at a drive-in movie when the main characters were all teenagers. That scene was relatable, nostalgic, and fast-paced enough that I was moderately interested; 3.) That Dorothy’s super power is strategy—how cool is that?! And that she can use it for anything recruiting strategical thought, such as board games, breaking out of a retirement home, or solving wars; and 4.) That the main story was about elderly superheroes!
But sadly, even the things I enjoyed were poorly executed. For a half second, I thought I’d be giving this book 2 stars because I like the concept of four elderly people fulfilling their lifelong destinies. Until I reached about 80% of the book and realized there wasn’t enough time for Dorothy and her crew to defeat all the lieutenants and the Master, which is when I remembered this was supposed to be a series. Oh boy. One book was bad enough. And honestly, it would’ve been better as one book. But a series? I couldn’t do it.
If you’re a snob for prose *raises hand*, then Dorothy and the Cane of Destiny is a letdown. Within the prologue alone, the writing itself bored me enough that I nearly stopped reading. The wording was clunky and unedited (misspellings, sentence structure errors), like I was reading from a first draft, not a published novel. I can forgive some mistakes if the rest of the writing is otherwise exciting or interesting. But this wasn’t. Take for example the lines, “The warm southern air was damp, but comfortably still. It was nearly always nice and warm down in Florida...” If a writer has to use the descriptor “warm” twice within a two sentence span, it makes me question their skills as a writer, but more importantly, neither of these sentences do much for the imagination. I literally felt like a drooling baby while reading most of this book because it took no brainpower to do so. ”He was naked as the day he was born, and using his hands to wash under his armpits. Like he was taking a bath.” Ugh! There’s so much hand-holding and “telling”, it hurts!
Granted, with a title like Dorothy and the Cane of Destiny, you aren’t selecting this read for the intellectual challenge, but rather because you’re looking to have a mindlessly silly time. And if you have the sense of humor of a fourteen-year-old boy, it delivers.
All of the elderly in Dorothy and the Cane of Destiny are portrayed as crotchety trickster caricatures who think poop jokes are hilarious. They’re not given any humility or wisdom, making them very one-dimensional and reinforcing stereotypes of “senile” or “angry” or “clueless” old people. It’s offensive to those of us who have watched loved ones deteriorate or be shamed for a variety of aging related experiences, but again, to people with the humor of a teenage boy, maybe it’s hilarious?
More specifically, let’s look at Dorothy and Walt. Cue the old-couple-that-bickers trope. Not just “bickers”, but Dorothy and Walter downright put each other down on a regular basis. Calling each other fat, wrinkly, and deaf. Some might argue, “People do that when they’re older though. They take cheap shots because it doesn’t actually offend them anymore.” I know what you’re talking about, and this wasn’t that. Both Walter and Dorothy were offended by each other’s constant criticisms, and if they’ve been together for 57 years, then this might just be the most toxic and dysfunctional relationship I’ve ever seen.
Not much can be said about the other two characters, Ferdinand and Forrest. Although Forrest was likable, his interactions and dialogue always felt like an afterthought. And Ferdinand? About 99% of his contributions to the story were fart or poop related. ”Ferdinand farted, which ended in a few wet bubbly sounds. He smiled.” Yup, you read that right! And you can look forward to about a dozen other gems like this...
The things I did like: 1.) The cover!; 2.) That the book began at a drive-in movie when the main characters were all teenagers. That scene was relatable, nostalgic, and fast-paced enough that I was moderately interested; 3.) That Dorothy’s super power is strategy—how cool is that?! And that she can use it for anything recruiting strategical thought, such as board games, breaking out of a retirement home, or solving wars; and 4.) That the main story was about elderly superheroes!
But sadly, even the things I enjoyed were poorly executed. For a half second, I thought I’d be giving this book 2 stars because I like the concept of four elderly people fulfilling their lifelong destinies. Until I reached about 80% of the book and realized there wasn’t enough time for Dorothy and her crew to defeat all the lieutenants and the Master, which is when I remembered this was supposed to be a series. Oh boy. One book was bad enough. And honestly, it would’ve been better as one book. But a series? I couldn’t do it.
traditionson's review
4.0
Full of flatulance
A fun and cranky book filled with the problems of age mixed with saving the world. As a medic my brain saw the joys and felt the pains whilst the premise was intriguing. Full of jokes (mostly bad) and a lot of anger at the situation (very apt). I loved the characters and their unique situations that really make the read fun and engrossing. A worthwhile read as long as you like a few poo jokes thrown in.
A fun and cranky book filled with the problems of age mixed with saving the world. As a medic my brain saw the joys and felt the pains whilst the premise was intriguing. Full of jokes (mostly bad) and a lot of anger at the situation (very apt). I loved the characters and their unique situations that really make the read fun and engrossing. A worthwhile read as long as you like a few poo jokes thrown in.
tonikayk's review
3.0
I love the premise in this fun short read. It was a great break from the usual. I enjoyed the antics but would have enjoyed a deeper back story to make the goofy characters real. This is creative and unique, but I finished wanting to more know about the main characters other than the quirks, snipes and farts.
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