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areadaburrito's review
informative
4.5
I really like the 30-day structure of the book, though it took me 41 days to get through it. I really hope people don't dismiss this book as 'attempting to cure your problems in a month' because the author recommends cycling through the book 2 or 3 times, similar to a Dialectical Behavioral Therapy course where you get the gist in the first cycle but have a deeper experience in the following cycle.
Each chapter is around 6 pages long. I'm a big fan of journaling as a method of healing, so I found the journaling exercises to be very helpful in digging into my perspective, validating what was valid, and processing to something healthier. I could have spent an entire week on most of the "days" if I was more thorough (which I will be on the 2nd round through the book). Some of the exercises were quite simple, others I had to chew on for several days before completing because they were difficult for me to even begin. And of course, not all of them applied to me, but the vast majority did once I dug into it. There were parts of the book that touched on other areas of my life, such as her brief discussion on indulging in celebrity gossip as a form of anger.
I liked the author's straightforward manner of explaining the concepts. I genuinely wish there was a series of these books for other emotions.
And the most important part of a review: Yes, I found this book helpful and yes, I'm a significantly less angry person today because of the skills I learned to dispel unhealthy anger.
Each chapter is around 6 pages long. I'm a big fan of journaling as a method of healing, so I found the journaling exercises to be very helpful in digging into my perspective, validating what was valid, and processing to something healthier. I could have spent an entire week on most of the "days" if I was more thorough (which I will be on the 2nd round through the book). Some of the exercises were quite simple, others I had to chew on for several days before completing because they were difficult for me to even begin. And of course, not all of them applied to me, but the vast majority did once I dug into it. There were parts of the book that touched on other areas of my life, such as her brief discussion on indulging in celebrity gossip as a form of anger.
I liked the author's straightforward manner of explaining the concepts. I genuinely wish there was a series of these books for other emotions.
And the most important part of a review: Yes, I found this book helpful and yes, I'm a significantly less angry person today because of the skills I learned to dispel unhealthy anger.
sbaunsgard's review
This is a Cognitive Behavioral book for coping with anger. In order to be able to use it, you need to have enough insight to be able to correctly recognize which subjects that the author discusses that do and do not apply to you. Trust me when I say they cannot possibly all apply to you. There are exercises which you need to complete to apply the ideas in the book. It was somewhat frustrating for me to do the ones that did not apply to me. I tried to use these parts of the book to understand the behavior of others. I did find several parts of the book helpful. Most of the anger that I was dealing with was from one source in my life. I was able to deal with it constructively before I finished the book, so I did not complete it.
The only part of the book that I read that I really have a problem with is the part where she suggests tonglen meditation as a method to deal with your anger with others. I think tonglen is great in theory, and I'm sure it could be very healing. I found it difficult to practice on my own even with more involved instructions, and I also found that it brought up a lot of emotions that I wasn't really ready for even when I wasn't feeling particularly emotional. Not that I'm an expert, but I wouldn't neccessarily recommend it for working on anger without knowing a person had some spiritual and emotional support ready.
The only part of the book that I read that I really have a problem with is the part where she suggests tonglen meditation as a method to deal with your anger with others. I think tonglen is great in theory, and I'm sure it could be very healing. I found it difficult to practice on my own even with more involved instructions, and I also found that it brought up a lot of emotions that I wasn't really ready for even when I wasn't feeling particularly emotional. Not that I'm an expert, but I wouldn't neccessarily recommend it for working on anger without knowing a person had some spiritual and emotional support ready.
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