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810 reviews for:
Platonic: How the Science of Attachment Can Help You Make and Keep Friends as an Adult
Marisa G. Franco
4.09 AVERAGE
810 reviews for:
Platonic: How the Science of Attachment Can Help You Make and Keep Friends as an Adult
Marisa G. Franco
4.09 AVERAGE
hopeful
informative
lighthearted
reflective
medium-paced
For a variety of reasons, I loved the second half of this book much more than the first. Not that I didn't get anything out of the first half as well, but if you're starting it and start feeling like it's a lot of obvious fluff and wondering why there are so many five star reviews, I do encourage you to stick with it.
One thing early on that was news to me and shouldn't have been: mudita! How is it that I have gone probably 15+ years* thinking English (which includes borrowed words such as schadenfreude, pleasure derived from someone else's suffering) lacked a word to describe joy or happiness for another's joy or happiness until polyamorous people coined the term "compersion?" *(maybe as early as 2006, when I first had a brief love affair with someone who self-identified as polyamorous and queer, and I had to look those words up and basically my life changed because I finally found language that described how I felt) Don't get me wrong, compersion is a great word and concept, and I enjoy telling people the setup and backstory for it and pointing out how odd it is that we have several commonly used words describing our response to others' suffering but not one to describe being happy for another person being happy. Mudita is a dharmic (Buddhist) word for sympathetic or vicarious joy - pleasure coming from another's well-being, which my intuition tells me is an important nuance that goes a step further than compersion. Anyway, I'm getting way off track from this book, which just briefly talks about mudita.
One thing early on that was news to me and shouldn't have been: mudita! How is it that I have gone probably 15+ years* thinking English (which includes borrowed words such as schadenfreude, pleasure derived from someone else's suffering) lacked a word to describe joy or happiness for another's joy or happiness until polyamorous people coined the term "compersion?" *(maybe as early as 2006, when I first had a brief love affair with someone who self-identified as polyamorous and queer, and I had to look those words up and basically my life changed because I finally found language that described how I felt) Don't get me wrong, compersion is a great word and concept, and I enjoy telling people the setup and backstory for it and pointing out how odd it is that we have several commonly used words describing our response to others' suffering but not one to describe being happy for another person being happy. Mudita is a dharmic (Buddhist) word for sympathetic or vicarious joy - pleasure coming from another's well-being, which my intuition tells me is an important nuance that goes a step further than compersion. Anyway, I'm getting way off track from this book, which just briefly talks about mudita.
informative
lighthearted
slow-paced
This book was a slog to get through (I listened to the audiobook) but had a lot of great information. It was validating to read as I was able to identify areas around friendship that I’m already excelling at - as well as providing areas where I can improve. The chapter on expressing anger was particularly helpful. Recommend for anyone who finds themselves in cycles of friendship that they find toxic or negative, and/or wish to learn more about deepening current friendships.
emotional
funny
hopeful
informative
inspiring
reflective
medium-paced
This book offered a lot of valuable information and interesting research and it made me think about friendship in a new way. I would have given it five stars if it was an easier and faster read. I got bogged down a lot in the long sentences and big words. Still, I would recommend it to anyone interested in learning more about friendship.
Did not enjoy. Much of the information is common sense and there is too much repetition.
slow-paced
informative
informative
reflective
medium-paced
funny
hopeful
informative
inspiring
fast-paced