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librarylandlisa's review against another edition
1.0
ugh. I couldn't do it. It was too punny for me... and that says a lot.
helen4's review
3.0
The first half is filled with fun moments and enjoyable characters but almost at the exact halfway point the book starts losing it's charm
redberrystraw's review against another edition
adventurous
funny
lighthearted
medium-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Plot
- Strong character development? No
- Loveable characters? Yes
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? No
3.5
fredosbrother's review against another edition
adventurous
funny
lighthearted
fast-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? A mix
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? Yes
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
3.75
princess_sparkle's review against another edition
funny
lighthearted
relaxing
medium-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? A mix
- Strong character development? It's complicated
- Loveable characters? Yes
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? No
4.0
holleysings's review against another edition
adventurous
emotional
funny
lighthearted
mysterious
tense
medium-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? A mix
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? Yes
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? It's complicated
4.5
The audiobook is amazing!
timinbc's review against another edition
3.0
It's hard to judge this without knowing where the authors were aiming. If it was 14-year-old boys who have read a lot of fairy tales and a lot of fantasy, it's a hit. Otherwise, it might have been better as a novella.
The map is a very early giveaway. Some very clever names, but far too many of the Beavis and Butthead variety.
My first fantasy parody was Harvard Lampoon's Bored of the Rings, which was a masterpiece and written for intelligent readers. I moved on to Avram Davidson, Fritz Leiber and many others of his era who could make fun of the genre while also telling a riveting story. Then the book of The Princess Bride, by the just-departed William Goldman, R.I.P. And of course Sir Terry Pratchett. And Neil Gaiman's retellings of fairy tales. So lookit, this stuff can be done brilliantly.
This work is nowhere near that league. But maybe it was never meant to be. Look at Harry Harrison's Bill the Galactic Hero series, or Pratchett's Moving Pictures and Soul Music (all of which I enjoyed). There is room in the field for some books that aim lower. Perhaps this is one of them, and perhaps it isn't one of the better ones.
All that said, it was OK. Just OK. There's room for the next one to be better if they dial back the poop jokes and write it for a reader who is a year older now.
The map is a very early giveaway. Some very clever names, but far too many of the Beavis and Butthead variety.
My first fantasy parody was Harvard Lampoon's Bored of the Rings, which was a masterpiece and written for intelligent readers. I moved on to Avram Davidson, Fritz Leiber and many others of his era who could make fun of the genre while also telling a riveting story. Then the book of The Princess Bride, by the just-departed William Goldman, R.I.P. And of course Sir Terry Pratchett. And Neil Gaiman's retellings of fairy tales. So lookit, this stuff can be done brilliantly.
This work is nowhere near that league. But maybe it was never meant to be. Look at Harry Harrison's Bill the Galactic Hero series, or Pratchett's Moving Pictures and Soul Music (all of which I enjoyed). There is room in the field for some books that aim lower. Perhaps this is one of them, and perhaps it isn't one of the better ones.
All that said, it was OK. Just OK. There's room for the next one to be better if they dial back the poop jokes and write it for a reader who is a year older now.
testaroscia's review against another edition
2.0
Ugh, I hate to give a "It was OK" 2 stars to Kevin Hearne but apart from some really pretty good puns and witticisms the story is just does not click. Back to Oberon and the Iron Druid series for light relief.
kathydavie's review against another edition
4.0
First in The Tales of Pell fairytale series and revolving around a small band of odd ducks. No, not real ducks, at least not yet.
My Take
Well, Dawson/Hearne had way too much fun writing Kill the Farm Boy. Filled with puns, snark, satire, and parody, it's an odd combination of fairytales intertwining with the normal life of insurance settlements, mail fraud, the Beard Club for Men, Pickelangelo, ROIs, and cardio exercise.
Ooops, almost forgot that part of society Dawson/Hearne has way too much fun with…partly because I see it so often, lol. It's a good foreshadowing for me, as I creep up in age, to know that I'll have a compulsion to read obituaries and complain about the weather and my rheumaticks.
The evil Dark Lord is more of a cowardly wanna-be with delusions. Argabella's preference for upper-capped words drives me bats, but I do crack up over her and Fia's "romance". Poltro's character is such a weird combination of idiot, klutz, and erudite that I'm rather pleased with her character arc. I suspect the Dread Necromancer Steve is a character who will show up in a later story.
It's a quest of adventure, skewering tropes and making fun of "white male power fantasies" from the toll-demanding elves, necro-bees and pools of leeches, monsters, the struggles of a misunderstood troll writer, stolen wands, battles, evil spells, a pellet-spouting goat, Pop psychology, and the typical thirst for power, all using third person global subjective point-of-view with insight into everyone's thoughts and emotions. The major perspectives are from Argabella, Grinda, and Gus, but Fia, Toby, and Poltro aren't shy, either.
So, if you think Animal House (the movie and Orwell's book), you've about got the atmosphere right. Oh, there are character arcs in here for the core characters. I think Grinda's was the most obvious, and she was the first to note Gus' fears.
I do love that ending though. The king at the end is a treat and a half with being so trustworthy. Lord, it won't stop after that, the populace will be demanding so much more after that…just like we keep hoping for proper attention. And it's that ending that also tells us where the series will continue to leap.
The Story
He is the Chosen One, the hero who is unlike any One who has ever been Chosened.
Saddled with an unexpected companion, the Chosen One sets out on his quest, gathering companions on this sinister journey of chickens, cheese, and umlauts, battling elves, trolls, and dark magics.
Truly a strange and wondrous journey to the most peculiar "happily ever after" that ever once-upon-a-timed.
The Characters
The land of Borix lies within the Kingdom of Pell
The family barnyard in…
…Borix is where Worstley is a pooboy, fed up with cleaning out the barn. Bestley had been his handsome older brother. Gustave is the chatty goat with an unending hoard of pellets.
In the castle at Borix,
…the hirsute Lady Harkovrita, the earl, the countess, and Oxnard the guard, along with everyone else but Argabella, a rabbity bard who wanted to be an accountant, are sleeping.
The well-muscled and very strong vegetarian, Fia the Mighty, clad in a chain-mail bikini and armed with her enchanted sword, shears, and a truly wicked bottle opener, is on a quest. Bief had been a childhood friend. Prince Konnan is from the east, seeking adventure and a wife. Seems he's also a friend of the Dread Steve.
Malefic Reach is…
…home base for the Dark Lord, a.k.a., Toby Fitzherbert, who is perfection himself with breads and whose goal is turtlehogs and unfettered access to fine cheeses. His father, the elder Toby, had been a true Dark Lord. Dementeria is his daytime housekeeper. The gorgeous yet incredibly clumsy Poltro, a.k.a., rogue — she bloody hates chickens; Snowflake is her gorgeous black stallion. Morvin is her brother who also works for Toby. Cutter is a huntsman who had trained Poltro. Moxie and Doxy are Toby's oxen.
Malefic Beach is…
…home base for Grinda the Goode Witche, a.k.a., Grinda the Sand Witch, who has a love for crabs and the beach and is Worstley's aunt. The sisters grew up poor in Cape Gannet, Burdell. Milieu Goobersnootch (of the Caskcooper Goobersnootches) is Grinda's halfling butler.
Hornswoggle is a good cheesemaker. Nardstromp's is a shop (and a trap) for wizards. Just ask Merlin and Glandalf.
The Morningwood is…
…the magical elvish home of Sylvinadrielle; Prince Bargolas who hates his father, King Rodmoore; and, Dribblesprig, a guard.
Songlen is…
…the capital of the kingdom of Pell. King Benedick is a drunkard who loves his Kolonic and was recently give a full cask of Amon Tiyado. Hurlga is Gus' governess. Mondeux Goobersnootch, Milieu's cousin, is the new butler.
Grinda's halfling contact, Humbert Beadlebone of the Cheapmeat Beadlebones sells information. Mathilde is a witch who was turned into a marmoset by Løcher. The Braided Beard inn is owned by Yåløndå Køpkümp and other hygienic dwarves who hail from Håpipøle. The goats include Cynthia, Dierdre, and Meredith. The soldiers who attacked include Petyr.
Løcher is chamberlain to the king and a very powerful wizard. Staph is a very disgusting pixie and his accomplice. His alarm goats include Beatrix (she ate one of Staph's blue socks), Blurt is the goatkeeper.
Lord Ergot of Bruding is easily bribed although he has issues. Staph insists that Butterblossom is a no-talent harpy. The dwarves live in Korpås Range. In crossing the Titan Toothpicks, they encounter Ol' Faktri, who intends to eat them so he can keep his hair. The prickly Yör is the steward for the Catacombs of Yör? Yore?, which is also the resting place of the Most Glorious and Puissant Hiruod Brønsted. Outside it lives Belladonna, a healer in the Order of Erotonia (they use the healing powers of the sextopus — Fabio is the one who healed Argabella), just beyond the tongues. Bigolo is Belladonna's assistant. Assassins Anonymous has AA meetings. Holden McBonecrunch is a troll unlike his father. The Dread Necromancer Steve had dated Fia once upon a time.
The Council of Merlins. NyeQuell is a cheap healing potion.
The Cover and Title
The cover is an odd blend of woodcut in the red and DARK red hill of a path up which the Farm Boy and his goat companion ascend, followed by that "vicious" chicken. Brushstrokes of green grass thrust up around the hill with a bright white light swirling over the group. The upper three-fourths of the cover is framed by warm brown trees with leafy green canopies, arching over a lone gray tower with a peaked copper roof on which the bright sun splashes out with warm, sunny yellow rays. A fanciful border of gold vines, shields, swords, flowers, tentacles, and bugs gives a sense of grace all around it. Angling up in the center is a hammered copper gothic font for the title. A punning comment is in the same deep red of the hill at the lower left just above the white text that starts with an info blurb and then the authors' names.
The title is the Dark Lord's plan, Kill the Farm Boy.
My Take
Well, Dawson/Hearne had way too much fun writing Kill the Farm Boy. Filled with puns, snark, satire, and parody, it's an odd combination of fairytales intertwining with the normal life of insurance settlements, mail fraud, the Beard Club for Men, Pickelangelo, ROIs, and cardio exercise.
Ooops, almost forgot that part of society Dawson/Hearne has way too much fun with…partly because I see it so often, lol. It's a good foreshadowing for me, as I creep up in age, to know that I'll have a compulsion to read obituaries and complain about the weather and my rheumaticks.
The evil Dark Lord is more of a cowardly wanna-be with delusions. Argabella's preference for upper-capped words drives me bats, but I do crack up over her and Fia's "romance". Poltro's character is such a weird combination of idiot, klutz, and erudite that I'm rather pleased with her character arc. I suspect the Dread Necromancer Steve is a character who will show up in a later story.
It's a quest of adventure, skewering tropes and making fun of "white male power fantasies" from the toll-demanding elves, necro-bees and pools of leeches, monsters, the struggles of a misunderstood troll writer, stolen wands, battles, evil spells, a pellet-spouting goat, Pop psychology, and the typical thirst for power, all using third person global subjective point-of-view with insight into everyone's thoughts and emotions. The major perspectives are from Argabella, Grinda, and Gus, but Fia, Toby, and Poltro aren't shy, either.
So, if you think Animal House (the movie and Orwell's book), you've about got the atmosphere right. Oh, there are character arcs in here for the core characters. I think Grinda's was the most obvious, and she was the first to note Gus' fears.
I do love that ending though. The king at the end is a treat and a half with being so trustworthy. Lord, it won't stop after that, the populace will be demanding so much more after that…just like we keep hoping for proper attention. And it's that ending that also tells us where the series will continue to leap.
The Story
He is the Chosen One, the hero who is unlike any One who has ever been Chosened.
Saddled with an unexpected companion, the Chosen One sets out on his quest, gathering companions on this sinister journey of chickens, cheese, and umlauts, battling elves, trolls, and dark magics.
Truly a strange and wondrous journey to the most peculiar "happily ever after" that ever once-upon-a-timed.
The Characters
The land of Borix lies within the Kingdom of Pell
The family barnyard in…
…Borix is where Worstley is a pooboy, fed up with cleaning out the barn. Bestley had been his handsome older brother. Gustave is the chatty goat with an unending hoard of pellets.
In the castle at Borix,
…the hirsute Lady Harkovrita, the earl, the countess, and Oxnard the guard, along with everyone else but Argabella, a rabbity bard who wanted to be an accountant, are sleeping.
The well-muscled and very strong vegetarian, Fia the Mighty, clad in a chain-mail bikini and armed with her enchanted sword, shears, and a truly wicked bottle opener, is on a quest. Bief had been a childhood friend. Prince Konnan is from the east, seeking adventure and a wife. Seems he's also a friend of the Dread Steve.
Malefic Reach is…
…home base for the Dark Lord, a.k.a., Toby Fitzherbert, who is perfection himself with breads and whose goal is turtlehogs and unfettered access to fine cheeses. His father, the elder Toby, had been a true Dark Lord. Dementeria is his daytime housekeeper. The gorgeous yet incredibly clumsy Poltro, a.k.a., rogue — she bloody hates chickens; Snowflake is her gorgeous black stallion. Morvin is her brother who also works for Toby. Cutter is a huntsman who had trained Poltro. Moxie and Doxy are Toby's oxen.
Malefic Beach is…
…home base for Grinda the Goode Witche, a.k.a., Grinda the Sand Witch, who has a love for crabs and the beach and is Worstley's aunt. The sisters grew up poor in Cape Gannet, Burdell. Milieu Goobersnootch (of the Caskcooper Goobersnootches) is Grinda's halfling butler.
Hornswoggle is a good cheesemaker. Nardstromp's is a shop (and a trap) for wizards. Just ask Merlin and Glandalf.
The Morningwood is…
…the magical elvish home of Sylvinadrielle; Prince Bargolas who hates his father, King Rodmoore; and, Dribblesprig, a guard.
Songlen is…
…the capital of the kingdom of Pell. King Benedick is a drunkard who loves his Kolonic and was recently give a full cask of Amon Tiyado. Hurlga is Gus' governess. Mondeux Goobersnootch, Milieu's cousin, is the new butler.
Grinda's halfling contact, Humbert Beadlebone of the Cheapmeat Beadlebones sells information. Mathilde is a witch who was turned into a marmoset by Løcher. The Braided Beard inn is owned by Yåløndå Køpkümp and other hygienic dwarves who hail from Håpipøle. The goats include Cynthia, Dierdre, and Meredith. The soldiers who attacked include Petyr.
Løcher is chamberlain to the king and a very powerful wizard. Staph is a very disgusting pixie and his accomplice. His alarm goats include Beatrix (she ate one of Staph's blue socks), Blurt is the goatkeeper.
Lord Ergot of Bruding is easily bribed although he has issues. Staph insists that Butterblossom is a no-talent harpy. The dwarves live in Korpås Range. In crossing the Titan Toothpicks, they encounter Ol' Faktri, who intends to eat them so he can keep his hair. The prickly Yör is the steward for the Catacombs of Yör? Yore?, which is also the resting place of the Most Glorious and Puissant Hiruod Brønsted. Outside it lives Belladonna, a healer in the Order of Erotonia (they use the healing powers of the sextopus — Fabio is the one who healed Argabella), just beyond the tongues. Bigolo is Belladonna's assistant. Assassins Anonymous has AA meetings. Holden McBonecrunch is a troll unlike his father. The Dread Necromancer Steve had dated Fia once upon a time.
The Council of Merlins. NyeQuell is a cheap healing potion.
The Cover and Title
The cover is an odd blend of woodcut in the red and DARK red hill of a path up which the Farm Boy and his goat companion ascend, followed by that "vicious" chicken. Brushstrokes of green grass thrust up around the hill with a bright white light swirling over the group. The upper three-fourths of the cover is framed by warm brown trees with leafy green canopies, arching over a lone gray tower with a peaked copper roof on which the bright sun splashes out with warm, sunny yellow rays. A fanciful border of gold vines, shields, swords, flowers, tentacles, and bugs gives a sense of grace all around it. Angling up in the center is a hammered copper gothic font for the title. A punning comment is in the same deep red of the hill at the lower left just above the white text that starts with an info blurb and then the authors' names.
The title is the Dark Lord's plan, Kill the Farm Boy.